Sunday, May 31, 2009


One more. Just one more for this month to make it an even number.

Finally got to just run across the road for some beer and food.. I mean I could have done it at any point but I didn't feel like doing it alone but I didn't and now I have someone to go with so I did.

It was nice. And now we can have June.


Well that's done.

He's back, showered, luggage is strewn on the floor, the cat is behaving oddly.. we're settled in. We can have June now.

A photo, just because...

I want to post one.

Afternoon in the park

This was taken exactly a year ago. Lovely day that was...

It's a lovely day..

It's actually raining, and quite cool for the day before summer. Perfect conditions for the return of Erik. Oh well, it's very hot where he's been so perhaps it'll be pleasant for him. At least the place is what I would call spick and span, at least comparatively.

It's strange, things are going back to normal again.. once again I'll have another human living with me here, someone to talk to, and see in person many hours out of the day, as it has been ever since I moved in here.. but it feels almost like.. I don't know. I almost forgot that there is someone else who was usually here.. as if. Just as if.

I've been existing in a sort of surreal not real reality sort of place the last month, and I've almost forgotten that things were ever different. I think it's something like that. I'd explain it better if it were explainable or I was proficient in explaining things which for some are deemed unexplainable. Well it's something like that.

I just can't wait to see the kitty's face when I open the door and there he is with me. I hope she smiles.

Saturday, May 30, 2009


This month of solitude is almost over. I will have company again!

Well.. I have had a bit of the month busy with people.. and just hanging out with people though the hanging out happened exactly twice. And there's the kitty. You're never alone when there's a little furry thing that demands as much attention as your average 2 year old, which makes sense as she is 2, but generally people refer to non furry 2 year olds when they speak of such things, and this one is furry. We have bonded over the month though, but I'm sure she'll be happy when her daddy gets back. She might snob him off for the obligatory few hours/day but she'll be happy again. I hope.

It's a good thing, him coming back.. I look forward, but as I might have mentioned before, I've really let this place go, and it's sort of come upon me rather quickly, the return. The incident with the cat piss and the washing machine hasn't helped, held me up a lot.. and I've been a bit ambitious with how clean I want to get the place, which means I've turned everything upside down and it's a bigger mess than it ever was...

however.. it's getting done and it will be done. I just have to do a bunch more things today, especially if I don't want to have to do any tomorrow which I don't.

Ok, enough of that, back to work.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Friday cute cat pic.

Cos it's what they do.

Silly Cooley

So I'm one of them now. Strange, I don't feel any different.

Damn modern technology stuffs

The damn washing machine still isn't working. I tried banging it? Numerous times and it still won't work! Bloody hell. I remember in the old days whenever something didn't work, all it needed was a good old slap. One singular bang, on the side somewhere, and voila! It worked. Always. Without fail. No exceptions. This new fangled thing however.. nothing. Still just won't do it. Well it starts but it stops before it does anything, or anything useful anyway.

Fuck! What's the world come to when the age old remedy of "the bang" doesn't fix things immediately anymore? Aren't these things supposed to be better? Why did they work so well int the olden days? Am I just remembering it through rosy coloured doesn't really have to use the things cos mum does it glasses? Doesn't really matter, what really matters is that my fucking washing machine still doesn't fucking work and I have all these cat pissed things to wash. Fuck. This fucking sucks, and she's still doing it by the way. Hope she stops it when her daddy comes home, which fortunately is soon, though he's going to need something to sleep on, which might prove to be a problem. Fuck!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Oh for fucking fuck's sake!

I don't know if it's because she's depressed, or anxious, or just weirded out from things being different... cos her daddy's not here, but the cat has lately had a habit of fucking pissing on things. Not that much, and otherwise she seems reasonably ok... but it's enough to fucking annoy me.. and of course it's all like.. my clothes, and things I need to sleep on.

So of course now the washing machine isn't fucking working. Either caused by being overloaded or just because the great cat up in the sky thought it would be good timing for this to happen. Who fucking knows.. in any case, these are 2 situations which don't suit each other, you can imagine.

Fuck. This is quite fucked. Now I'm going to go try the old "bang it and hope it starts working again trick". Again.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009


It was March of 2006. Now I'm up to 42. Yes, I'm a superdork. Carry on.

With this post..

I beat my own record for posts in one month. I'm at 41 as of publishing this, which I haven't yet, but by the time you (there's that you singular again, and yes, I still think I'm being ambitious) read this it will be. The only month that comes anywhere near is some month of some year ages ago, it's on the side, look it up if you care.. no idea why I had so many posts that month as the next closest is like 26 or something. This month it's no mystery, I've made a point of posting often, at least once every day and more than once more than one day. So I'm up to 41 and it's still 4 days until the last day of the month, which I'm counting down to for more than one reason. Actually there is only one reason but that doesn't have anything to do with what I'm writing about now.

It's easy to push your post count up quickly if you just post shit like this you know :)

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Tuesday SQNEA #7 - The how many times edition.

Today's stupid question is one I thought of while commenting elsewhere. I was pondering the newness of something that claimed to be "new" complete with quotation marks and I mentioned that it had probably been done "umpteen" times.. or rather "or the umpteenth time". So my question is, just how much is umpteen anyway?

And that leads me to another question. Does anyone ever say "umpteen"? Is that even a word? Is it, and/or can it only ever be used in it's er.. counting stuff tense?

I'd like to know please.

*puts glasses back on*

By the way, according to blogger's spellcheck umpteen is not a misspelling.

It's pretty hot.

Of course I'm being a wimp, it's about 27°C and some people in places where it averages about 40.. of course 27 is what the weather report says, but it also says it's raining, which is not correct so who knows.

I've been doing nothing! Nothing interesting, nothing I'm supposed to be doing, nothing creative or otherwise. I should be cleaning, I should be posting stuff, I should be fixing this mess I have here, literal and otherwise, but instead I'm doing this.

I guess I am doing something. I should have said nothing useful. Then I would have been correct.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Yes, I know what day it is, thank you.

It's Monday, and the word o the day is:

fillip - a snap; also, a stimulous

Okay. Sounds like a name, in fact my cousin has/had a dog with that name. Maybe it just had one l though.

It gets more complicated when you get more.. er complicated, well anyway there's more:

1. A snap of the finger forced suddenly from the thumb; a smart blow.
2. Something serving to rouse or excite; a stimulus.
3. A trivial addition; an embellishment.

transitive verb:
1. To strike with the nail of the finger, first placed against the ball of the thumb, and forced from that position with a sudden spring; to snap with the finger.
2. To snap; to project quickly.
3. To urge on; to provide a stimulus, by or as if by a fillip.

I've got a feeling I won't be using this in conversation. I'm still not sure about it. Don't like it that much to be honest. A bit boring. It has been used by literary types though.. like this:

If any one in Mirgorod gives him a neckerchief or underclothes, he returns thanks; if any one gives him a fillip on the nose--he returns thanks then also.
-- Nikolai Gogol, "The Tale of How Ivan Ivanovich Quarrelled with Ivan Nikiforovich"

You fillip me o' the head.
-- Shakespeare, Troilus and Cressida

Yeah.. still boring.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

What a good idea!

That's what I thought yesterday when I was invited to go meet a friend in a beergarden, seeing as I've been on my own most of the month, haven't been socializing much and that hanging out in beergardens is generally considered a pleasant thing.

And it was. Lovely evening, hung out with this friend and some other guy I'd never met before, we talked, we laughed, we drank beer. It was pleasant but mostly uneventful, except for the incident at the pub we went to afterwards when it got dark where I knocked my glass over and broke it.

You can probably guess from the aforementioned incident that I got pretty drunk. Which also led to me having something of a hangover when I woke up today. And it sucked. It sucked for the obvious reasons that hangovers suck, and also because I had things to do today. I had to go to the film school to dub over some scenes in which the sound didn't come out right. Luckily it got put back 2 hours, giving me some much needed time to recover a little, but I still felt quite shit by the time I had to go. Not too shit to be puking on the way however, I just about passed being ok to go out.

Once I was out, I figured no biggie.. it'll just be sitting and talking. Well it was partly. I was in a tiny little sound booth going over some words that were either said wrong, according to the director, which were drowned out by the other actor coughing in the scene.

First I had to say "yes" over and over again a bunch of times. This was ok, but then I had to do the other scenes, which were the louder, shouting scenes, and I needed to stand up so the sound would be right. Of course they needed to be done over and over again.. I did a bunch one way, then he gave me a different direction... then I needed to do it the particular way it sounded on the video, and then he changed his mind and wanted me to do it differently.. After saying these words 20 times it made my head spin, but I didn't get sick in that dark claustrophobic little room, which is a positive.

It was actually done pretty quickly, luckily, and I was able to leave. I did need to puke when I went out on the street though, but I went around what seemed like a secluded corner, though there were still windows from the film school in view. I did try to do it discreetly, so perhaps no one saw.

Anyway I'm much better now, thanks for asking.. and now I'm done with the film. He doesn't need me anymore. Unless of course what we did today wasn't sufficient and it needs to be done again.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Oh wait.. it's actually Friday..

*looks embarrassed*

I remember now, because I went to the post office even though I didn't really feel like going but I want to get that stuff out before Monday, and don't really feel like getting up tomorrow so I can utilize the Saturday post office hours. Why on earth did I think it was Thursday?


well anyway, it's actually Saturday now because it's past midnight.

Friday, May 22, 2009

And with barely a minute left to go...

A while ago I put together a system which I sometimes refer to as "dorkism", and other times "days o' the week" er.. thingy. Anyway, it's where I have a thing to do for every day of the week and on Thursday it's beseeching you to caption a photo. Well, no one ever captions the photos I leave, but I'm going to do it anyway, even though Thursday is rapidly running out. Here it is.

Synchronized kitties

The sheer volume is..

Or is it the sheer number? I speak of how much I've written this month, so far. There were, at the time of my clicking on "new pot" 33 entries for this month. I think number is the more correct word as some of those posts don't have much in them, either content wise or sheer number count wise. I think that's the same thing, replace content with... er.. quality, or something. I have written a lot of shit this month, that at least I can be confident of reporting accurately.

As you have probably guessed, and I do mean "you" singular... and I realize I'm being rather ambitious even then... I don't really have anything to write about, and want to have at least one entry for today, so I'm blogging about a) blogging, b) nothing, c) my life, which is uneventful at the moment and probably d to g, if I wanted to put those same things in different words.

*sighs* I actually do have some ideas for "proper" posts, but I'm too lazy to do those right now, so make of that what you will.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

A small change.

I thought it was time to update my profile a bit. I rewrote it and now it says the same thing it said before but with different words, but more importantly I updated the photo to something more suitable for a serious spinster such as myself. I'm afraid the other one wasn't really "me". Now I feel I'm being accurately represented

*lowers spectacles on nose*

Random, unconnected memories from my "big night out.

Last night I went "out". First time in ages so it was a tiny bit of a big deal, to meet some people I'd never met before in order to get a group together to make films.. anyway.

*We met at Náměstí Republiky, at the metro entrance in "the middle of the square". This place is in the centre so it's kind of busy, and has many metro entrances, and it's not really a square in shape, at least you can't tell with all the buildings around, despite being called "náměstí" (which means square). Anyway, I got there at 7, as requested and didn't see anyone who looked like whoever was showing up out of these people who I'd never met. I wandered around looking at all the different exits (the same thing as an entrance) and couldn't see these "film" people. After about 15 minutes I started to wonder if they'd just gone, but I kept doing the rounds of all the exits. At about 7:20 I spotted this guy in a spot he hadn't been a few minutes ago. More modern garb, more colour in his face and shorter hair, but familiar looking. He was talking on the phone so I sauntered up close enough to be able to hear him a bit. He spoke in English with a Scottish accent so I kind of mimed "are you the film guy" and he nodded. I waited for him to finish his phone convo, someone had got off at Masarykovo nádraží instead of Nam. Republiky because the metro station has 2 exits which aren't really near each other... and this "point" is getting long so I won't go into much detail. We waited for him and it was this guy. Also with more modern clothes, and less makeup.

*Another point, one which runs immediately after the last one, so I might as well be telling this in regular story form, but he, the first guy suggested we go to a place that has coffee and cakes.. I thought. er... I'd like a beer. The other dude isn't really a drinker and likes coffee so he was all for it, so I thought.. whatev. That place was closed unfortunately :) so we went to some internet cafe in the area, it worked because it has both coffee and beer.

*Drinking beer, after you haven't been so* much used to drinking it recently, when other people are drinking coffee, can make you look a bit silly :). Actually one of the other guys drank beer too after the first coffee, but not as many as me. He explained all, no one from the first meeting was there, so we introduced ourselves, what we're interested in doing, and what ideas we have. Then we talked, with a bit of brainstorming, a lot of getting off topic and a fair bit of starting talking about one idea and coming up with 8 different mostly unusable ideas that resemble the original one not at all. There were a few good things in there, and between all the stuff we talked of, we might be able to do something. I introduced a few of my ideas which weren't completely laughed at or dismissed, which is nice.


*I should just take my tripod with me whenever I go out at night, I always (particularly after drinking) get the urge to take cool night shots, and never have the proper shit to rest the camera on. I'd probably lose it though. It's best to go out, not drunk, with the aim of taking cool night shots, and I've been meaning to do that for, about 3 years now but haven't done it yet. Wait, I have, once, on the corner of my street.


*Walking through the city at night, you're guaranteed to overhear English speakers, and pretty much always some Americans. I was walking out the metro and there was a group of young people, some woman said something about snow "it's pretty in the snow" and they talked of that for a minute, I thought it odd, considering the time of year, and then they referenced the blossoms that are all over the streets and she said "it's like a pretty snowfall" or something silly like that, and they went on about that for a bit, waxing poetic and the like. I swear it sounded funnier when I was walking amongst them drunk, and could remember what was actually said.

*Some ideas for a blog post are better than others :).

*I have been having a few beers at home occasionally, but not usually more than 2, and it's always Gambrinus, and last night I was drinking Pilsner which is slightly stronger. This is in reference to the "so" with the asterix after it by the way, as opposed to the bullet points :)

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Well fuck!

Ok so one thing got resolved, due to me spending money and the other one didn't, and probably won't. And it cost me money.


I'm going out tonight. Finally I have some something social to do, which doesn't he anything to do with filmmaking anyway. Except for that it's a meeting of a bunch of people interested in putting a film together.. but at least it's just talk. And being around people. And drink.

Repeats repeatedly..

Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups.
Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups.
Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups.
Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups.


Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be a day of technology fuckups. Today will not be

actually I sorta kinda want the fuckups that fucked up yesterday to be resolved. *sighs* We'll see.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Bangs head on desk

Now the fucking camera isn't fucking downloading pictures on the fucking computer... fuck!!!

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.... what the flaming fuck is going the fuck on for fucks sake! Well?


*scowls, which turns into a yell and then flails arms out angrily*


I think my computer's killing things. Seriously. Fuck.

One word.


That's not really a word is it. Well, in short. It's still not working! It didn't actualy happen the way I thought it would, I went there, got my money, got another thingy at another shop, that didn't work, I took it back, got it exchanged for another one that worked on the computer there and I brought it home a it's doing something different but IT'S STILL NOT WORKING. I MEAN WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?

And of course the people in the shop have to act surprised like that never happens, it's so unusual and we never have people return these.

Well you've met me now. Deal.

I thought it was too easy.

A few days ago I went and got myself a wireless adapter thingy in order to be online on the other computer, my computer. I mean, I'm online on this one, Erik's comp, the laptop and that's fine, but there are photos and programs and stuff on mine which I like to be able to access, it's also a desktop, which is easier for me to do stuff on and it has more space, runs smoother.. all sorts of things.

Now, you might be wondering why I'm referring to "this" computer being not the one I'm speaking of, seeing as I got an adapter for that one, well, read on.

I brought it home, stuck it in, immediately got a little icon pop up and a wizard asking me to install new hardware, I installed the driver, etc etc etc. Did all that and was online. Amazing. I know that's supposed to happen, and they make things simple nowadays, for folks like me who spend most of their time on a computer but nevertheless don't know much about hardware and the nitty gritty sort of stuff, but it still surprised me, as every time I try to do something new it gives me a hard time before (usually) inevitably working, but not as easy as they always tell you in the shop.

Here again, you might be wondering about the "other" computer reference, seeing as I succeeded in getting online on this "other" computer. Keep reading.

Well, Friday and the weekend I coasted on happily, getting used to being able to use the mouse, revisiting all my old links that I forgot about, having more room for stuff, accessing and being able to upload all those photos...

then yesterday (Monday) as I was doing whatever I was doing, there was a little message I got saying if I used a high speed port I could get a faster connection, so I thought hmm, why not" and tried it in another port. I didn't get to find out if it was faster or not, because after about half a minute my icon disappeared and the internet went off.

I didn't know what it was at first so I tried a bunch of stuff, don't remember the details now. I tried all the other ports and none of them worked. I uninstalled and reinstalled the program but it made no difference, no icon and the light wasn't coming on. I tried all sorts of different things but it doesn't matter it didn't work. Today after turning the computer on I tried again just in case it would magically come back but no. Gone.

So I'm on this computer, and I know it's a bit of a whine, as I'm obviously online and it's not the worst thing in the world, but a) all the reasons stated at the beginning, and b) I just bought the fucking thing and when you buy things they're supposed to fucking work, and keep working.. at least for a few months or years or so for fucks sake!

In a little while I'm going to take it to the shop and see what they say, if they either replace it, fix it, or tell me the mystery of why it's not working. I still have the receipt, the box it came in, with the little cardboard holder, and the bag they gave me with it, one of the benefits of having the thing fuck up on me so early, so I should get someone to give me the time of day, but I already know what's going to happen, so I will now do something a little unorthodox and give you the history of what will happen when I go there. Ready?

"Hi I bought this 3 days ago and it quit working on me, it was working fine until (etc etc etc, story I told you already)"

"Oh, that's odd" *looks at receipt, takes the whatsit and sticks it in a usb of a nearby computer, thingy lights up and computer shows an icon* it's working fine now"

"but it wasn't working on my computer, it didn't work yesterday, I tried it in every port, and today again it didn't work, it didn't light up, it didn't do anything"

"Well it's working now"
End scene.

Monday, May 18, 2009

You know when..

you're in the post office, waiting, and you notice people looking at you oddly but you think nothing of it and let it go after a few seconds and later when you get ready to go to the counter and take your package and slip out of the bag and sort your stuff out you realize your sunglasses are on your head still and it probably looks a bit strange because you put your reading glasses on as you entered the post office and it comes back to you that people were looking at you weird and you realize that was probably why?

Well it just happened to me.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

See the little goblin..

I'm drinking beer. I'm only on the first so I'm not seeing goblins yet. Unless you count the furry little one that's clambering around on the computer chair.

I made bread today, or rather yesterday or rather the wee small hours of the morning.. I wanted bread with breakfast and was intending to do it yesterday and zoned out on it until about midnight, and then I thought for and against for a while until I decided to start it about 1am.

And they turned out like rocks, which sucks because the last 2 times I made bread it was fucking awesome. I know what you're thinking it's because I started it at such an hour, but I think it's because I changed the quantities, I made less than usual because it's just me here, so I thirded everything.. and I think maybe I didn't use enough yeast, or something. Dunno. It's not that bad, it's edible, but it is quite disappointing.

I have beer though, and that softens the blow a little. *burps*

A post.

I'm not writing this just because I've done at least one post for every day this month so far, and haven't got anything to write about.

Ok yes I am. Carry on.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

My goodness!

I've had a productive month, so far. If you talk about blogging anyway, every single day! And more than once a couple of days. Of course, it doesn't end there when speaking of productiveness.. if you talk of film acting then I've certainly got a lot done in that department, if you talk about sheer hours worked and don't put so much emphasis on quality of performance. I'm thinking that goes for blogging as well.. h mmm.

With regard to regular work, ie stuff I'm supposed to be doing.. my main source of income.. er. I'll talk about that later. Got a bit of stuff to do :Z

Friday, May 15, 2009

Friday Random 2..

The last 2 songs that played randomly* on my computer are:

Fuck You - Lily Allen
Nazi Punks Fuck Off - The Dead Kennedies

I fucking rock. *Adjusts shades*

*Ok so I selected a bunch of songs to play, but I randomly selected those without trying to choose anything in particular so it's still sorta valid. Whatevs.

And finally, something that's not all about me..

This is such a cool word:

unctuous - marked by a false or smug earnestness or agreeableness.

Oh how very Wickham-esque

Of course, there are more meanings

1. Of the nature or quality of an unguent or ointment; fatty; oily; greasy.
2. Having a smooth, greasy feel, as certain minerals.
3. Insincerely or excessively suave or ingratiating in manner or speech; marked by a false or smug earnestness or agreeableness.
Oh, and just so you know, pronunciation is \UNGK-choo-us\. Get it right.

A warmed, crusty French roll arrives split, lightly smeared with unctuous chopped liver.
-- John Kessler, "Meals To Go: Break from the routine with Hong", Atlanta Journal and Constitution, October 22, 1998

She recalled being offended by the "phoniness" that stemmed from the contradiction between her mother's charming, even unctuous public manner and her anger in private.
-- Daniel Horowitz, Betty Friedan And the Making of 'The Feminine Mystique'

There you go.

Because there just isn't enough of the minuteau of my life in here..

I'm not entirely certain I used that word correctly, but I don't care. Sue me.

Shooting has finished. Fi-nished. It's a relief, but I think I'm going to cry. Actually no, it's too early for me to start missing all the excitement of being on set, right now I'm just glad I don't have to shoot off anywhere later. Except for the post office.

I have, though coming in at about midnight last night and instead of going to bed I sat down to write a blog post and then hung out a bit, done a few things already today. Quite fruitful really. I got the thing I was supposed to get yesterday but didn't, and I have a box, a perfect box for the thing I need to send out later. Now you're starting to realize how interesting the details of a movie set are, aren't you?

Well.. it's good. I'm catching up, and cleaning up. Remember how I mentioned it was a dump in here? Well it's not anymore, ok it still is but it's getting better.

That's about all really.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

And that's..

...a wrap, to use the parlance of our times.

I'm back and the reshoot is done. Well it wasn't actually a reshoot but new scenes that weren't shot before, and it wasn't one scene it was 3, and each scene needed 2 shots each, meaning 3 for one, 2 for one and one for the other. Or something like that, well anyway in total it was how many it was. And of course each scene needed at least 8 takes, and 4 to 6 rehearsals and there were some aborted starts and we had to wait for a battery to charge again.

Still, it's still Thursday, and I've made it home with a stop to pick up some junk food, which means we finished before 11:00, which means it took just under 3 hours which is slightly less than was estimated, so kudos to us.

Scenes were pretty simple, just walking, looking and standing. I had to look through a peephole which sounds simple and was except for the closeup of my eye through the door, where I had to stand very still slightly hunched with my body twisted and eyes wide open with a light stuck right up to my face while he gave directions through the door. We had to do that scene more than a few times. Without blinking of course.

Got it done though, and he seemed happy with it all, and that's it for me. There might be some voice work to do still, but he didn't say anything about it when I left so I'm assuming I'm done with this acting lark until I get another gig, which despite all my whining throughout this saga I hope isn't too long.

Right, I'm off again.

To do the reshoot. Those who read regular will know what I talk of. Those who don't won't care, so I'll leave it at that.

It was supposed to take about an hour, but now it seems like the estimate is 3 hours, so I'm going to look forward to being safe back here by midnight. And I mean here, in my comfy slacks and on the comp (stuffing my face, watching something amusing etc) with the shoot done and past me, none of this.. well I'm back cos we didn't do it after all and have to reschedule again sort of thing. Here, in the evening, with everything done. That's what I'm aiming for.

Oh shit, I shouldn't have said it, now it's going to take 18 fucking hours. Fuck, I shouldn't have even thought it.

Now come on, there must be something you can say about this..


Caption please.

Ok, this evening.

At 20:30. Shouldn't take more than 3 hours.

And then I'm done.


Wednesday, May 13, 2009



Well, I'm back. And it's before 5pm, that went quick, I hear you say.

Ha! As if.

So, a few hours ago I left to shoot more scenes, or rather reshoot a scene that wasn't good enough the first time we did it. Whatever, I got there at 3, the scheduled time. I sent an sms but no answer. A few minutes later I got a message from director dude saying he was running late, be there soon.

Ok, whatev.. I went to get myself a snack. I returned and Jarka the makeup artist was there. She wasn't so pleased to to hear he was running late, seeing as she needed to go somewhere else afterwards, and this was the reason why we'd changed the time from 5:00 to 3:00, and why I'd been quite particular about being there on time. We waited. No one showed up, but about 15 past I got a phone call, he said he was on the way.

We waited and waited and waited. She made some phone calls saying she'd be late, or wouldn't be able to make it. I got a phone call again, he was stuck in traffic but I could just buzz the flat and they'd let me up. Why he didn't suggest that before I don't know, nor why I'd been smsing before every time I went there before I don't know. I went to press the name he told me and before I could the door made that "you can open me now, sign".

So we went up. Got comfy and she did my makeup. As soon as she finished he got here. Good timing! I thought.. no. Turns out he didn't have the lenses, or something and we couldn't shoot today at all.

After all that.

He did give me some money though, a fair bit which is as it should be considering everything. We have to reschedule again, he said probably Saturday, which sucks because I was hoping to have a relaxing, post film weekend, but on the other hand it's good because it's not a work day and it won't clash with all the other things I need to do which I'm further behind in because I didn't get any of it done today... of course if I'd known there'd be no shoot today I probably would have.

Doesn't really matter. I'm glad to be home now, mostly.



Ok, so this time yesterday I was tired, having finished shooting at 4am though we were supposed to go until midnight, not that it made any difference because a certain furry feline wouldn't let me sleep, and I had to get up to be there to shoot again at 1pm.

That turned to 2pm, then he was late so we got in at about 2:30, then he fiddled around setting up. The makeup woman came and had to wait around, I waited around... finally started shooting at I don't know what time, but I'll guess 4:00. We did the "bathroom" scene, which was a little nervy for me, but not as much as I thought it would be.. then I had to wait around again, dripping wet and in a towel... got the makeup done so our m-a artist could get on her way...

waited for him to set up... then more crew members showed up.


12 hours later I'm still in the flat and we've 2 scenes left to shoot, that was before he remembered the other scene, the final eye opening scene that tells us what the story was all about.. so we have 3 left to do. Of course that means something like 14 shots..

and the camera battery dies.

Director goes to get food and stuff and we wait around. I feel like sleeping. He comes back.. they set up and we rehearse a bit... now.. I'm bad enough at this acting while rehearsing (much like my acting while the camera's going) but when I'm as ready to sleep as I was at this time, it's not what I want to do most in the world.

We finally got another scene going. I walked back and forth through the hallway a few times. It took me a while to know what the fuck scene he was talking about before we even got started, but that happens at what was probably 4am.

And it died again. So we waited. Rehearse the phone scene and went back in the kitchen to set up. Day was coming in slowly through the windows, so of course they took particularly long to set up.

We shot. Didn't shoot as many takes as on average, but more because we had limited battery power, than because it was so late and we were tired, though the late and tired did play into it some. The take being actually any good didn't have much to do with the decision. We had to take the scene from 3 different angles (3,4, 6?) of course, so that took time. The last scene was simple and fast, just one take, so we took 3. And we were done. The good thing about it was I could walk home in daylight. It was 5:50 when I left.

And that was it! Now we only have to reshoot a scene that was crap or too dark or whatever at the other flat, so I have to be there at 3pm. I don't even want to be out of bed yet! And I have all of this other stuff to do, which I stupidly thought, I'd have time to do today. Today's shoot was originally supposed to be at 5, so considering (as I thought) I'd be done by midnight yesterday, (a conservative estimate, seeing as the original start was at 1) that I'd get plenty of sleep, and be up early not feeling like total shit, but no.

Today's shoot is supposed to take an hour, after makeup that is, so I'm expecting to be home by daylight tonight. I just want to go to sleep.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Just stopping by..

I'm tired. We shot more scenes for the movie yesterday. I got there 16:30 and the goal was to finish at midnight. I got there on time, the other actor was about half an hour late, and the crew were fiddling around with lights. At about 9:30 we started doing something, we began rehearsing the scenes we were shooting at just before midnight and I left at about 4am.

We're shooting again today, starting 1pm because, we finished at midnight you see, and that's plenty of time to get some sleep :Z

If I'd actually come home a bit after 4, slept pretty much until just now I'd be fine, but someone decided to be hyper and jump on the bed and meow at me at regular intervals throughout the night/morning.

I'm so fucking tired. I'll probably be shooting until about midnight again (meaning well after that of course) and I don't know if I'm up for it. I have a semi nude scene today, and hopefully being out of it will make it easier, if anything. Still not quite sure how that will be. I just want to go back to sleep.

Monday, May 11, 2009

What is that noise?

Today's word o' the day is..

bombinate - To buzz; to hum; to drone.

It sounds pretty innocuous until you get more detail:

He is often drunk. His head hurts. Snatches of conversation, remembered precepts, prefigured cries of terror bombinate about his skull.
-- Elspeth Barker, "Nobs and the rabble, all in the same boat", Independent, September 22, 1996

That sounds kinda negative.

Sometimes the computer bombinates way into the night, stops for a bit of rest, then resumes its hum at the early hours of the morning.
-- Cheryl Glenn and Robert J. Connors, New St. Martins Guide to Teaching Writing

Hey, that's very modern. I can actually relate to that.

Anyway.. happy Monday.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

It's a sign.

The most amazing thing just happened to me. I was in Billa which I call Delvita, no reason, or rather there's a reason but it's too boring and irrelevant to this story to bother with explaining, that's a supemarket by the way, walking around, picking up a few things and I wandered into the beer aisle, thinking about picking up a few bottles, and regretting that I hadn't picked up a basket on the way in because I already had enough stuff in my hands, and then.. I saw it

It was a basket lying on top of some stuff at the end of the aisle. There wasn't anyone around so it seemed unlikely a shopper had just put it down for a minute, but still... I went closer. And it had nothing in it! So I picked it up and went on my merry way. With the 2 beers.

Amazing isn't it? I mean, what are the chances.. (does sums* in head) um. don't know, but it made my day.

Rehearsal was ok too. It was kind of nice to act with another actor for once, I don't think I disappointed the director as much as I usually do today.. so I'll be resting on that ok feeling until.. I'm estimating about 5:16 tomorrow, exactly 46 minutes after I arrive for rehearsing a bit more before the shoot. But that's just a guess.

*I haven't used that word since I was about 8.

Saturday, May 09, 2009

I'm not quite alone.

It's been just over a week since Erik left to spend the month in Singapore, but I haven't exactly spent that time on my own. Of course, one is never alone when one has a furry, cuddly feline around, but that's not my only companion, there is another, one that I kept somewhat at bay for a good while now, who arrived with promptness after my return from the airport.

I speak of my old friend squalor. The dictionary definition of squalor is:

the condition of being squalid; filth and misery.
I wouldn't go so far as to say encrusted, but.. it's pretty chaotic in here. More messy than filthy, and not quite wretched, but there has been a marked change in the environment here.

Like I said it started when I came home from seeing Erik off, I walked in with my shoes on, sat at the computer, threw them off and was going to put them in the hall when I thought "I'll do it later, I'm the only person here, no one will be bothered"... then I flung my jacket on the floor the same way, later after making something to eat, I left the stuff in the sink.. and as time went on, more and more things we left unwashed, in places they shouldn't be.. it was just not big deal. No one but me to live with it, no one else to go ahead and clean it up for me and make me feel bad. It's not that I wasn't going to do it, it's just that by the time I was going to there was more of it.

As each day passed it built up. I cleaned the dishes once, a few days ago.. I think, but there's more of them! It just keeps building up and building up. There's crap all over the bed that was on top of the printer, there's boxes for packing stuff that hasn't gone out yet, or that's the wrong size for the stuff I need to send out (and I don't even have a box for something that urgently needs to be sent out like, a week ago, but that's another story) and clothes all over the floor. But that's no different than usual actually.

I'm not proud of it. Well I am in a rebellious, non gender conforming, "see what a rugged unladylike character, not like those other fussy girly girls I am, *burp*" way, a sentiment I am in turn not proud of having. If that makes any sense.

When it comes down to it, the reason isn't complex. I'm lazy. I am bothered by excessive slovenliness (the only word amongst the synonyms of squalor which match it, imo) like a lot of people, but it's got to the point that there's just so much there! And when it gets to the point that it bothers me that much, that it overrides the excess of mess that's there, I will clean it.

And it will be a complete dump again within 12 hours. Oh well... whatever happened to servants, don't we have those anymore?

Friday, May 08, 2009

Right that's it! Maybe..

Acting. I'm done with it, once and for all! Ok, not really but I thought that earlier today, for about a minute. Maybe about 30 minutes. I was rehearsing some scenes for the short film I'm doing. We're filming again on Monday and Tuesday and there are still some scenes that need to be rehearsed.

I was first humbled by the mention in a during rehearsal chat about last weekend's filming. Some scenes just didn't come out good enough and had to be cut out or dubbed over, because my lines were said shit, basically. Something like that. I was feeling alright about everything up to that, but that brought back the whole not good enough and feeling like the director is way regretting that he chose me for the role feelings.

The rehearsal itself was full of me saying everything flat and wrong and not being able to get simple stuff right. Ok maybe that's just me exaggerating, but he picked on some very specific stuff, the inflections of my words for instance. It was kind of... well it just seemed like I couldn't do anything any good. For a while. Then he spoke more about the scenes he didn't like so much from last week and it wasn't just me, but everything at the time so I felt a little less shit about that, but then there were more specific problems with everything I was doing.. really simple shit that shouldn't be a problem for someone who considers themselves an amateur but at least moderately adequate thespian... or so I think. Maybe he's just a nitpicker. Maybe I'm just being expected to do shit that doesn't make sense in way that doesn't work. Maybe I just don't have enough experience, maybe I'm lazy, maybe I just suck.

Anyway, I've got this one to finish. Rehearsal tomorrow, then Sunday again. Filming on Monday, Tuesday, probably a bit of Wednesday and then we might still have more scenes to do. We'll see.

Oh and I have my nude/semi-not so sure how-nude scene to do. I get out of the bath and put a towel on, he asked if it would be a problem and I said it should be ok but watch me freak out when I have to do it. I don't know.. I wanna be professional and whatnot but.. well, again, we'll see.

Overall it was ok actually. I don't want to give the impression that today was bad at all :)

Thursday, May 07, 2009

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

It's not yesterday, it's not the day before but..

I feel like dorking out, and feel like doing it Monday style, with a Tuesday word, so there.

quaff: to drink heartily

I'm so gonna use this one, I mean I still haven't gotten around to adding ululate to my regular conversation, but I might have more uses for this one I rather suspect.

1. To drink a beverage, esp. an intoxicating one, copiously and with hearty enjoyment.

transitive verb:
1. To drink (a beverage) copiously and heartily

Yep. This one applies to my life.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Tuesday SQNEA #6 - The public transport edition..

This is one that someone probably has asked, or rather would if it were a question rather than an excuse for a rant, but I'm going to present it (them) in question form so it counts. It's probably not that stupid either, come to think of it.

Why oh why... (I think I'll start all of them like this now) oh why do people stand on the left of the escalator in the metro? This is one those of you living in wide open areas with lots of big cars won't understand, and it's quite possible that people in other parts of Europe are more well mannered than here, but someone might just understand.

Here in Prague we have a metro (underground, subway, tube) system. A lot of people use this system. They are accessed by by buildings at street level and these buildings have escalators which take you down to the part where the platforms are. Still with me? Well, due to the fact that lots of people use this system, and therefore have to travel on the escalator to go to where the trains are at, many of whom are in a hurry, it is requested that you keep to the right if you're standing on the escalator. This is, as you may have guessed, to allow the people who wish to get to the platform quicker, by walking down it (or up the escalator when they're getting out of the metro, to get to work or catch a tram for instance) to walk down it.

And of course there are always people who are standing to the left. Usually when they're with a friend beside them so the two of them are blocking the path. This on it's own wouldn't be so exasperating, but you always see people blocking the way, someone get there attention, they turn around and look surprised, like this is an unusual thing, move over, let the person past, and THEN MOVE BACK TO THE SPOT THEY WERE IN! When I see people do this I always make a point of walking whether I was going to or not so I can make them move out of my way. And they always look surprised when I get their attention.

I was going to say something else about public transport, but I think this one has been long enough.. after all. And I thought I had nothing to write about? Seems as though there's always a stupid question to ask.

Monday, May 04, 2009

Ah.. it feels good to be completely lazy..

I didn't get around.. well I didn't try very hard.. to doing the stuff I was supposed to do that I had put off because of all the filming. Oh well. It involved going outside and it's rainy today. I'm not even going to bother dorking out today, but to be honest I don't like today's word.

I did do some dishes though. I've been using the luxury of having the place to myself to let everything go.. it was fun to do but when the mess builds up it gets annoying so something had to be done.

I might watch a movie now.

Sunday, May 03, 2009

Ok, this will be the last one of these for a while..

We did another shoot last night. I started off in the same costume, with the same uncomfortable shoes and ridiculous fake groceries, did some scenes walking out the front, then walking into the hall, and then walking up stairs. We had to shoot all of these from different angles and of course many takes were needed. Apart from the pain it went ok, I guess :)

Then I got to change into "something more comfortable" and yes, the director did describe it like that.. I was playing the middle of the night scenes, so it was night stuff with night gown and slippers, which sounds really comfy right, but it was kinda weird with some little nightie thing that didn't fit me (of course) which I wore with pajama pants and a dressing gown that looked more like some kind of secret agent coat. And slippers which had little heels and were too small for me :Z.
It was a lot more comfortable than the other costume though.

It did go pretty well though, I was more pleased with the scenes I did than I was yesterday, and I remember thinking, around say... 2 something that the shoot was going much smoother than yesterday's.. night's the previous shoot :Z The director seemed to feel that way too.

This feeling continued until about 4ish when he mentioned the scenes we had to do tonight and would probably be shooting until about 6. It went downhill from there.

A scene had to be adjusted because it involved shouting and running and making a lot of noise, and by the time we got to it it was 5 something so we changed it to me shouting not so loudly and doing stage whispers, running and making a lot of noise.. and then doing it from another angle. You can tell where it goes from here, and yes, the cable remains unfixed.

At about 6:30 we were doing the "last" scene, which was the last one before the one after that, which had to be shot from at least 2 angles. That one took a long time for some reason. The light was a problem, being full daylight and all so some time had to be taken out from the usual time consuming things to black out a window.

The crew were falling asleep. By then we were doing first takes which were "just fine". I'm under no allusions that either my or the other actor's acting, the sound, the lighting or anything else involved were that great, it's just that.. *snore* where was I???

oh yeah. We finally got out at 7:30.. I think we did finish all the scenes we needed to though, with a few necessary adjustments.

Next shoot is on the 11th, so I get to sleep now.

Saturday, May 02, 2009

*falls asleep*

Actually I wish I could, I could use some sleep from now until about 5pm. Last night we shot from 22:00 (that was the time I showed up anyway) to 5am. I got there at 8, the dude was there earlier because his beaten up looking homeless guy makeup takes a long time. It was about 10 before we shot anything because of the setup of all the lights and everything. It was probably midnight before I was needed for anything.

The night was long. I had to wear that uncomfortable outfit and those damn shoes again. First I had a simple scene to do where I walk up the stairs and then notice something and look at it... it was terrible.. I just couldn't make it seem natural. First I was walking too clumsily in the shoes... wonder why, and the director gave me all these specific instructions on how to move my hands or where to stop and turn and then was dissatisfied with it.. it looked unnatural, gee wonder why. I went through it many times and after a while I was completely unable to do any character thing whatsoever.. and was getting tired and feeling pressured. I tried to do it "my own way" meaning I walk how I walk but that was utterly flat and devoid of any spark as well.. partly because I'd done it so many times and party because.. well maybe I'm just no good at this stuff, in fact I'm certain of it. Anyway.. finally I did it slightly different, very simple, just stopped and turned a different way and he liked it. It felt just as unnatural to me as all the other versions, but whatevs. Then we set up to film.. everyone came out, the sound dude, the light dude, and the other actor and we went through it once... and then again because that's what you do, again because there was a bit of sound that wasn't meant to be in one, so again, and all the lights went out. It was all hooked up to the electric in the flat and there was like 4 lights and a camera and whatsits so it was too much for it..

so we had a break and waited for the lights to cool down and be usable again.

So we set up again, and did it once, did it again because that's what you do, did it again for safety, and then a few more times for one reason or another. Then we filmed the same scene but from a different angle... after they'd reset everything.

We filmed more scenes, a sequence that we rehearsed in one was cut up into about 4 scenes and we filmed them from about 3 different angles each.. it was difficult to stay in character and be natural when it was all so cut up, so my acting pretty much sucked in all the filmed scenes, I don't mind most of it except for the one where I say a line.. and all the takes that seemed "good" from the other side of the camera's point of view sounded terrible to me.

I spent hours, on and off in those bloody shoes and had to carry a paper bag the old fashioned way, under my left arm, but of course no one uses those sorts of bags here so we got one that looks like that sort of bag if you cover up the handles and my hand aches from holding it in that weird position so much.

The electricity went out twice more during the night. We meant to film about 9 scenes, I think we got 4 done. We were supposed to go until 3 at the latest and finished at 5. By that time I didn't mind so much, at least I could walk home in daylight.

I came in to a hungry cat screaming for food.. or possibly she was saying "where's my daddy???" and give me some food :). I slept a bit earlier but I can't really sleep in the day. And I ache. Back, feet and left arm. I could complain more and probably will at a later time, but that's enough for now :)

Friday, May 01, 2009


Shot the first day's footage of my other film, the one I'm actually acting in, yesterday.

It was daytime, in the park, and the shoot was mostly of me walking, stopping and looking around. My costume was the favourite part, a word of advice for filmmakers, if you're a dude, or otherwise a person who doesn't really know much about women's clothing and women's stuff due to not doing them/wearing them, don't have really specific ideas on what you want, unless you have a huge budget and professionals who can sort that stuff out for you. Mine had these sorts of ideas. Of course, my costume was lovely. I had a sort of flowy but not really long skirt, a black shirt which he forgot to bring so I just kept on the one I was wearing, and a green jacket too small for me. The best were the shoes, very high heeled and pointy, and too small for me. He said bring tights, and as I only have black ones I brought those. The shoes were tan coloured. I also had a scarf around me, some dangly earrings and necklace. It mightn't sound like anything in particular but it looked like a combination of hippy, girly and trying but not succeeding to be professional.. and as it happens my character was described (in our early rehearsals) as curious, childlike, confident, and someone who's unremarkable so perhaps it fits.

My hair was done by me. He called up 2 days before and asked if I could do something myself, it didn't mater, as long as it curled and had volume. Kay.. so I got some mousse and some curly brush thing and succeeded in creating nothing. Then I just scrunched it up so it was sorta curly but mostly messy and that was what I was stuck with. And he wanted me to wear these hideous glasses too, but I deliberately forgot to wear them when we were shooting. And the makeup made me look.. combined with this outfit.. absolutely middle aged and horrible.. he wanted pale, so she made me pale and then regular makeup but no eyeliner, and I don't look good without eyeliner.. but nevermind.

So we shot.. we redid takes again and again, the shoes hurt like hell, but there was always a problem with sound or something.

After the park we shot some scenes by the river, on this little jutting out thing that was completely unstable and wonky, and he wanted me to go out there with those shoes on, but I felt too uncomfortable, so he had to shoot those scenes without the feet visible.

It was a nice day.. shooting went ok I guess. I think my acting sucked in the scenes I did because I was concentrating too much on getting the actions right... so complicated to walk, stop, pretend something is on your shoe and look up and around :) but that's how it always is.. I'm just not a professional.

We went late.. and probably would have gone later if it hadn't started raining near the end of the shoot... just as well it did, I got to go off to Al Capone's for a night before Singapore cocktail with Erik..

oh Erik left today.. did I mention that? I'm off to shoot number 2 in a few minutes, the night shoot.

This deja vu feels familiar..

Got back from the airport a while ago. My it felt familiar. Seeing someone off, then leaving, alone..
of course last time I was there just over a month ago the familiar feeling was much stronger.. just the day before I'd done the same thing, with the same person in what can be described in no other way than a debacle.

I've spent a fair bit of time at the airport in recent years, not so much as this last month or so, but I've gone out to greet people and see them off more than a few times. Not so much to go somewhere though. Not at all actually.. I should work on that.. gets a bit much seeing people go places all the time you know.

Well he's gone. Just for a month so I think I can keep it together. Have more filming tonight.. oh, there was filming yesterday, but there's so much I want to say that's simultaneously stimulating to me and completely boring to anyone else.. ie the same as I've written about all the rehearsals that I don't know where to start and I'm tired. Snore.