Sunday, December 21, 2014

Festive schmestive.

I'm honestly not noticing the festive season much this year. The lack of being around other people or in fact getting out at all is the major factor. Well that's why. It's not that I don't know it is or that when I do get out, which is to go to a shop or whatever and I do see isn't christmas trees everywhere or whatever but.. I dunno. It just doesn't seem as much like xmas as often does. That's not a bad thing, I've had a blissful lack of crappy song earworms so far and that is enough to abandon the whole thing altogether as far as I'm concerned. Still..

It's all a factor of me being here alone, not engaging, living in my little bubble with a cat for company. I'm on my own time, and in an alternative though utterly boring reality. I even totally forgot about a whole night out I had last weekend because I was so used to living like this, I tried to rack my brains about the last time I'd been on a tram, or spoken to be people for real and I utterly blanked it.. as well as the worker dudes who came in to replace the water heater but that's a lesser thing.

Of course again I'm making no point. There is non though, not in this particular piece of writing nor in my life. I am not real, my life is not real, I have no purpose.. I'm just here, pottering around day by day being of no consequence. It's not unusual though, it's a microcosm of my life overall.. I am always this, I am always thus. There is simply no reason for me.

Not saying it's necessarily a bad thing, it just is.

Sunday, December 14, 2014

And back again.

Back to normal, that is in the sense that I have nothing going on nothing to do and nothing to show for myself. It's been a few days or a week or however long since the last thing I had to do in that week of (relative) busy that I had. The last thing was the film, not the film I may have already mention though I'm not sure if I did, but the other one. The one I"m almost certain I didn't mention because I haven't written since before we had even scheduled the shoot let alone.. well anyway it's the other one. The one I worked on with the group,  you know the group I'm in that does films. It went well. At least I think it is, I don't remember that was already a week ago.

That whole week, or week and a bit.. *scratches head wondering just how long it was but not enough to bother to figure it out* was unusual for a week that I'm here alone that is here alone with no other human, I'm not really alone, I am with the kitty, in that I had a fair amount of human interaction, I went out among other people and spoke to them and was in their real physical presence for amounts of time that is typical for the average human, or at least close to it. So, we did the film and..

I came home. That was a week ago. I haven't left since. Well that's not true I've gone out for short walks and to get stuff from the shop, but I haven't said 2 words to any human in physical reality since then. Actually that's not true the words one uses when one is in the shop is more than that, I think, don't remember.. hmmm.. but I haven't interacted with anyone else. I don't think.. *scratches head again*

but not to worry, Cooley is extremely intelligent and she understands a lot about a lot, we've been having some very deep conversations. Mostly about tuna, but everything counts.

Saturday, December 06, 2014

O the excitement.

As far as I know, I have very little going on. I possibly have one thing going on, one day, but that mightn't even happen the way things are going.

Not to be said for the past week.. from my not exactly exciting birthday dinner, to flying off to Amsterdam the next day, having drinks with an old friend (and a new) that night, leaving Erik the next day to fly off to Vancouver (him, not me) and a day in the biting cold and grey city by myself (and possibly old friend, if I could manage to meet up with him without the newfangled technology that the kids have... it did, surprisingly) and then back already to Prague, but not home, to run off to some bar to talk to some guy about a thing.. in the drizzle. Waking up to snow the next day, yes, it really was that cold, not just my imagination. Onto a film set the next day somewhere out in the boonies, though somewhere very nice. Mostly waiting, but still a movie. Finally we close the week with the thing I went to the bar to talk to the guy about.. hosting this thing called a "pub quiz". You may have heard of one. The usual person couldn't make it so this guy, this guy in the bar needed someone else to do it and apparently couldn't find anyone else cos he really hounded me about it. I had some stuff explained but it turned out there was a whole bunch of shit that I had no clue about. It turned out how it turned out.. I reckon I was suitably charming and witty.. 7-8 out of 10 for that.. my score for knowing how the fuck it worked and dealing with the computer and the powerpoint thing and the microphone? About a 3 if we're being extremely generous. 

Anyway.. I'm looking forward to some nothing for a few days, though by a few days or perhaps sooner I may change my mind.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Oh.. another one?

It's my birthday, again. No big deal really, everyone has them and they have them every year. I usually make a big bruha or bruhaha or whatever you call it about it but this year I'm relatively ignoring it, ie making a deal that's only slightly bigger than the average deal about a birthday.. or do people generally make a bigger deal about birthdays than the people I know who aren't me are? I don't know.

So it's my birthday and over the last year I've.. um. Still being me, still mostly.. let's just say all those things I wanted to do? Didn't do them. So I've been in more films than I have in any one year, I think. I've done some other stuff, a voice recording, er... I think some other stuff. I had a job for 3 days, which I didn't get paid for, have made a friend, or friends, it seems as part of a group of people making films, which seems like we might last for long enough to get one film done. Those are things.. those are good things.

I've hardly been anywhere one day out of Prague, in Brno, but otherwise barely left the city limits. Well I think apart from that I didn't leave Prague at all.. well at least I went somewhere once. I do have a trip out of the country, even if just for one night, to somewhere I've never been coming up but it's past the cutoff for this "year" that is the year by this birthday so it doesn't count.

Anyway, like I said, no big deal, whatever.. stop bangin on about it.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Is it me...

or is it the lack of light, the drizzle, the cold which isn't really all that cold but it just seems like it should be because it's all grey and damp so I feel like I'm cold anyway or that I would if I went outside?

I think it's me. And maybe the season. Mostly me.

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

What was I saying?

So it went pretty well, despite my whining, it turned out to be, just a good thing, a pretty to very good thing. I could use more of that but good things are good things. Of course, when I got home today, after a good thing, feeling pretty good about myself, even joking about how little I have to whine about, really.. I get the balance.. yeah, something showed up we.. not showed up just a reminder and the specific details of something which is not on the good side of things.

Well, I guess that's life in general. I'm no different than anyone else. Again, there are a few other things that came up, things on the horizon, 2 to be specific but at the rate that the horizon promises things there could be more soon. Of course, the ratio of things to images on the horizon is pretty small. Still, anything could happen, and I'm hoping for it to be good. just good would be nice, for once, but I think I already went over that.

Sunday, November 09, 2014

Ah yes..

o well..

that didn't work.

So, things happen, and you have to take the bad with the good.. I know that, I understand that, just.. when there really in'st much of anything at all, good or bad, but when there is it's mostly bad, during an era with a constant undercurrent of quite bad if not actually terrible, does everything good have to come with just a tinge of shit? Can't something just be all good for once? And while we're at it, make it just a touch better.. oh and more of it. Thanks.

Tuesday, November 04, 2014

Partly forth, mostly back.

I seem to be going back and forth all the time between having things going on, that's things on the horizon that have potential, and everything completely sucking. Today had potential and potentially still has potential but as the hours pass... the potential for potential gets.. um.. less.

I'd call it a rut but it's really just my life. Still.. need to get out of it whatever you call it, things need to change. I think I may have said that before, more than once even. It's just as well no one reads anymore (or never really did but now really especially doesn't) because I don't really need reminding of the numerous times I've said something of the sort just to say oh.. I didn't do that, or that didn't happen, or I'm still intending to do that but haven't yet and this time I totes like will.. honestly. Not that anyone, if they did read would read that closely.

Well.. tomorrow is here soon, who knows what it will bring (actually me, I'm reckoning "not a whole lot").