Wednesday, May 31, 2006


It's uncanny!
Originally uploaded by Mutant Cat.

It's me. An impression of me. A sort of impression by me. Well it's art, so perhaps it isn't entirely realistic. I had fun modeling for it though. Pretty much sat in a bar and chatted, all at someone else's expense. Took some photos as this example shows. Very similar to my first choice of way to spend an afternoon. Well, my actual first choice might an unusual combination of photography, sex, internet and a very nice dinner, (and the company of a different gentleman though this guy is cool, some of the factors are to be enjoyed with a particular person) but beer and pubs are pretty good. And the final result is me, as art. Or sort of me anyway.

Monday, May 29, 2006

No flowers or sunsets here.

Monday. The beginning of another dull, drudgerous week and waiting for another weekend, sigh. Oh ok, my impulse to grumble is just too strong. I really have nothing to complain about, not since Mr Computer has decided to start behaving (fingers, toes and everything crossable crossed).

It's not a particularly lovely day but I'm off for my first "sitting" with my new artist friend. He's going to sketch me. We'll probably be in the pub as it doesn't look like weather for the park, but that's all cool with me. In fact great! Two of my favourite things, hanging out in a pub and having people fuss over me and make art out of me, could it get any better?

Well actually it could get a lot better but if I wrote the list of ways in which "things" in general could improve I would be here all day and miss my appointment, so see y'all later.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Sunday Evening.

The dark side.
Originally uploaded by Mutant Cat.
And I'm feeling, dunno. I got my photos on the computer, finally, so I feel better than I was earlier on. I was getting extremely irate there. Most of the photos weren't mine, and a couple were mine + his but I'm not showing them to anyone else so I only have a few to show for my hours of tirelessly trying the same shit over and over again until it finally worked. This is one of them.

And on with another week.

Will it ever end?

It really seems to be a week for technology problems. At least I hope it is because if it isn't that means it's just going to be a regular thing. After fixing my computer the other night, all was well the next day. But then yesterday I took a few photos, just for the fun of it and tried to put them on the computer. It just wouldn't work. I have no idea why, I tried and tried again, restarted the computer and everything I could think of.

I use Flashpath which is a disc you put the memory card in, and I've been using this for about 3 years, it's didn't come with the camera. I have the hardware that came with the camera, but not the installation cd for the software because the man who did the buying at the time let the guy he bought it from second hand tell him he couldn't find it and it was easy enough to download it from the internet. I was slightly annoyed at this but as I was using something else it didn't matter so much.

Well now I need it, and I've tried downloading all sorts of different things and none of them work. I'm doomed, nothing will work.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Mr Duck says Quack!

Gimme food!
Originally uploaded by Mutant Cat.
I met Mr Duck yesterday as I was wandering around by the river Vltava. "Quack" apparently means "gimme some goodies", as just minutes before I arrived there was a gentleman generously handing out duck treats. Obviously I was viewed as a potential feeder.

I was armed only with my camera, and unfortunately didn't have any duck goodies to give out, but he posed for me anyway. Good duck.

As I mentioned yesterday I also managed to get shots of dancing Slovakians, dancing buildings, bridges, a castle and some swans. Check them out on Flickr.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

I fixed it!

It's ok you can hold the applause. Don't ask me how I did it, I'm not sure, but I something seemed to work. Of course now the internet is working really slowly, making it impossible to catch up with everything I missed today. Typical. At least I have something to complain about.

I suppose my best friend being temporarily dead today had a good side. I actually got my ass out into the centre and took some photos, though I thought I'd never be able to get them off the camera and see them properly. It was great, ducks, dancing Slovakians, dancing buildings. All sorts of crazy stuff. Of course now I can't upload anything because the connection is so damn slow, so you'll have to wait to see them.

This is typical!

I'm suffering from the indignity of having to post this from an internet cafe. Why you ask? Well my computer is dead. Fucked. Buggered. Frumxed!

I made that last one up. Well anyway it just won't turn on. I tried again and again this morning and it just won't do it. Well it kind of turns on, the Windows logo comes up and looks like it's going to start normally but then the screen just goes to black and stays there. I don't know what to do with it. I tried looking up the problem to see if it was fixable, and the only thing I seem to have found out is that its probably a hardware problem, which information is about as useful to me as if it were a werewolf problem. I don't know anything about fiddling around with the hard bits! I'd just break it.

So I'm here. Apart from the futile attempt to find a fix from my problem I had to check my email, blogs, stats and photo stuff so I've been here a while. I don't have my phone with me because someone had to borrow it because he lost his own the other night getting seriously shitfaced. He needs it because he has meetings with people, and I don't really need it that much because I don't have a life, or friends, or any purpose. And now I don't even have a computer. I'm going to cry now.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Wednesday don't have to come up with a subject blogging.

I've been suffering from a severe case of blogger's block recently. I simply can't think of anything to write, and if I do it's something very uninspiring. Not that it matters as no one seems to care, views and comments have gone down drastically and I can't say I can blame you.

Nevertheless I feel fortunate that a few weeks ago I came up with gimmick in which at least one day a week I can fulfill my blogging duties without really having to come up with anything, and instead just do a couple of piss poor translations of a random bible verse. Which is what I'm going to do now.

John 2:15... "Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him...And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof; but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever."
a) All you need is love. (la da da da da) All you need is love.
All you need is love, love. Love is all you need.
Love, love, love. Love, love, love (and on and on for about 3 hours, getting very high in the meantime.

b) It's not material possessions that matter but love. No I don't mean don't eat or clothe your children or whatever, just that live your life for your family, friends, and yes, Jesus instead of riches and fame. I mean by all means have a nice house and stuff, but don't get obsessed with keeping up with the Joneses sort of thing, and don't rip of and exploit people. That's totally whack.

c) Jesus is coming! The Rapture will be upon us soon. We don't care about worldly things. We know the world is going to be over soon, so we don't have to worry about the environment or our children's futures. We can pollute and overpopulate and screw the poor to our hearts content.


Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Speaking of splitting.

I had a headache which could be described as such earlier on. I got the slightest bit tipsy last night. And when I say "slightest bit tipsy" I actually do mean that I got a little bit drunk, instead of coyly suggesting I got totally shitfaced. I just had a few beers, which is enough to give me a headache the next day. I managed to banish it though, so I have nothing to complain about.

The 2 people I was with, however seem to get to that state which one would refer to as shitfaced. At least the one who lives here is a little bit worse for wear. When I came in this morning the place was a disaster, a complete mess, stuff was knocked over, the computer was on, stuck on the music folder and the speakers were turned up high, so I can guess what went on here.

And he was in the shower, muttering incoherent nonsense to no one in particular. It was during the time he was snoring on the couch that someone knocked at the door. I did my best impression of someone who wasn't here and ignored it. Whatever it is it's nothing to do with me. I'll let the man answer for himself when he's in a condition to do so.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Kind of like splitting, only louder.

I have nothing to say about much of anything these days. Not a thought in my head.

Word of the Day for Sunday May 21, 2006

bombinate \BOM-buh-nayt\, intransitive verb:
To buzz; to hum; to drone.

He is often drunk. His head hurts. Snatches of conversation, remembered precepts, prefigured cries of terror bombinate about his skull.
-- Elspeth Barker, "Nobs and the rabble, all in the same boat", Independent, September 22, 1996

Sometimes the computer bombinates way into the night, stops for a bit of rest, then resumes its hum at the early hours of the morning.
-- Cheryl Glenn and Robert J. Connors, New St. Martins Guide to Teaching Writing

Bombinate is from Late Latin bombinatus, past participle of bombinare, alteration of Latin bombilare, from bombus, "a boom."

A bit of education on a Sunday is better than nothing.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Why I should never have children.

I would probably turn into this woman.

Mom taking photos of son: Smile, sweetie.
[click click]
Mom: Smile from within, honey.
[click click]
Mom: Smiling from within means smile like you're happy on the inside.
[click click]
Mom: Okay, not that much.

--Prospect Park
Of course I'm quite happy to just take photos of me, I'm my favourite subject. But that's because I don't really have any family, many friends or other victims to take photos of. If I did they'd have a hard time living up to my standard.

Friday, May 19, 2006

I'm fabulous.

Upside down.
Originally uploaded by Mutant Cat.
In fact I'm the greatest! Join me in greatness if you dare.

I met my new artist friend yesterday over a few drinks, too many drinks actually, I'm just the slightest bit poorly today, but anyway we plan to do a sitting in a park sometime soon, once the weather decides to uphold. So I shall be in a painting. Really it's about time, the world has suffered from the lack of me being immortalised in this particular way for too long.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Time to get saved.

It's Wednesday, so it's time to work on our spiritual health. Today's verse is quite a simple one,

Psalms 95:6... "O come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the LORD our maker.
a) We are only human, we're sinners. No matter what greats we achieve, what kind of wealth we have, we're still only ordinary human beings. Be humble, remember that only God is perfect and live your life without being an arrogant asshole who thinks they deserve more than everyone else.

b) The LORD is our master. The LORD is the only one who says what is right or wrong. Except for those that follow the LORD in every word, thought and deed. The LORD says that faggots are evil and every whore must die, that evolution is a LIE and women must submit to their manly man masters. I KNOW this because it's written in the BIBLE, and only the BIBLE says the truth. Some things in the bible can be pretty much ignored, but the things I said earlier MUST BE OBSERVED!!!!

c) Let love God, worship and adore god, let us bow and kneel down before him and feel his warmth on our face, oh yes, oh God, keep doing that, that's good.

Enough already.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

A new career opportunity.

Last night, I got a strange message in the middle of the night. Well it was 1:30 but I was sleeping, I'm not half as exciting as you all think I am. The message was something like "I'm an artist, new to Prague, your friend Doug said you might be interested in being a life model, a "muse" if you like, and let's meet up.

I read it blearily and went back to sleep. In the morning I remembered it, and wondered if I hadn't just dreamt it, as even I don't get messages of this sort every day. I checked and there it was.

As far as I know, the muse is a woman who inspires art. She exists to help the man, the artist create. I would say she's a cross between a groupie and a patron, if you see it in the way for a woman to be an artist in a patriarchal society where she can't just do it on her own. Of course nowadays things are different, and someone like me who is the creator in her own right in many ways, the idea of the muse is, against my religion so to speak.

But, as none of my many examples of dabbling in the arts include actual art art, (unless you include some of my latest photos which are beginning to resemble a kind of bad art), I can do it. That and there's money in it, though I'm happy to stick with the title of model.

So we'll see what happens. Not sure what he expects, whether he'll like me, whether I'll be able to sit still for as long as he needs, but I'll meet him sometime soon and get back with you.

Monday, May 15, 2006

Signing my life away.

Today I'm going to be signing the contract for my flat. I've lived there for about 2 months but it's been quite loose and easy. The guy who lived there before had the contract and I was just subletting the room from him. Now that there's a new person in there someone else has to take over the contract, and we decided it would be me.

It doesn't sound like a big deal, I know there's people out there who own houses and cars and have children and stuff, but for me this is really like being grown up or something, even if it's only for 6 months, not even a year as they usually are.

The reason it slightly bothers me is that the place isn't absolutely ideal for me, and I'd like to live somewhere that is, I didn't mind living in less than perfect conditions when it was just month by month and I could leave whenever I wanted too, although it's probably the closest to ideal I'm going to find right now, and I probably wouldn't do anything about finding a better place anyway, but now it's 6 WHOLE MONTHS I'm expected to stay there.

So my plan is to get my shit together enough in 6 months so I can finally get what I want, and what I want now is a place on my own. No sharing, I can have kitties, I can wander around naked when I want, watch tv all day, make a mess in the kitchen and clean up when I can be bothered to.

It's not that my place or situation is so bad, it's ok. I don't want it to sound like I live in a hellhole or anything, I've just gotten to the point where I want what I want. Now I have to wait at least 6 months for it.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Just because it feels good? Never!

Yeah but cats just sleep all day and let themselves out whenever they want.

Trust fund girl #1: But you have to have a baby. Babies are so cute 'cause you can dress them up.
Trust fund girl #2: Totally, and they are way easier then dogs.
Trust fund girl #1: You don't have to walk them even...

--5th & Park
And anyway, who needs a reason to have a baby, we all have biological urges to reproduce, or so they say, though a new article in the LA Times disagrees. How could this not be true.
THE GERMAN PUBLIC was recently shocked to learn that 30% of "their" women are childless — the highest proportion of any country in the world. And this is not a result of infertility; it's intentional childlessness.

Demographers are intrigued. German nationalists, aghast. Religious fundamentalists, distressed at the indication that large numbers of women are using birth control.
I'm shocked, appalled. Perhaps it's time to bring back those breeding farms, I mean, what's wrong with these women?

Well, it seems, according to David P. Barash, evolutionary biologist, that people have sex because they feel like it. Sure there are plenty of people who want children still, but that most likely isn't the motivation for copulation every time they do it. Something to do with it feeling good, or some such nonsense.

And of course there are those of us who have no desire to procreate ever, and for some reason we still like to fuck. Fucking is pretty much a means to itself. Sure it can be a way of bonding with your partner, getting what you want from someone, earning money, as well as getting pregnant, but generally, we do it because we want to. It's that simple.

Friday, May 12, 2006

The least interesting glass of beer in the world.

Originally uploaded by Mutant Cat.
This beer is very uninteresting. Extremely uninteresting. At least it's the least interesting out of all the photos I have on Flickr. For all those who don't use Flickr you're probably unfamiliar with the concept of interestingness. In fact, if you do use Flickr you're unfamiliar with interestingness, and in fact if you are familiar with the concept you don't understand it.

It works like this. Some photos are more interesting than others. That's about it. It's supposed to be based on how many comments, favourites and notes you get, and what those comments, faves and notes are and who gives them, but it MAKES NO SENSE! I've been whoring this photo for months trying to get people to pay it attention, and in fact have gotten it a lot of attention. It actually spent one night at my #1 most interesting spot, and the next day it dropped out of my top 200. Anyway, now it's my least interesting and I have no idea why.

So if you want to go on over to Flickr and shower it with love, click on the photo and go ahead.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Cheese will always save the day.

Well life seems to be settling down to it's usual pace, that of sucking in an empty boring way as opposed to a stressful way. I'm still a little stressed about a few things to do with my flat and the upcoming signing of the contract, but I'm more just kind of bleegh!

I was going to sort out the contract yesterday but my new flatmate fell asleep before the landlord showed up. He seems to be still on American time. It was still early evening, and as his room is also the shared living area and kitchen I sat in my room reading for the rest of the night, after creeping in quietly to get a yoghurt from the fridge, so as not to wake him.

Now one measly yoghurt isn't enough to last me a whole evening, and I began to get hungry. I waited though, thinking he might wake up and go off for a bit. I waited and waited. All I had in the kitchen was some bread, cheese and ham. Nothing that needed to be cooked, but still a bit difficult to prepare in the dark quietly.

Finally I crept into the room again, quietly opened the fridge door and grabbed my cheese and ham. I went back to my room and ate it just rolled up together. It might seem uncivilized but I was fucking starving.

I hope this guy gets his clock sorted out and starts whatever he's supposed to be doing soon. Apart from liking to use my kitchen, I need to wash stuff (the washing machine is in this area as well) and it might even be nice to sit in my own living room and watch tv once in a while. I'm not sure how it's going to work out, but I'm being pressured to sign a contract for 6 months, which I'll probably do this week.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

The flood shall come pouring in.

It's Wednesday again, and that means it's time to get down with God. This week's verse is:

Genisis 6:13... "And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth."
a) I'm kind of embarrassed to admit that I've made a mistake. Most of my creations are utter assholes and I need to destroy them, believe me, I'm deeply upset about this. Oh no, you guys can stay, it's just every one else that has to die.

b) Quick Noah, gather up all your family and their families and get 2 of each animal so they can breed again after I destroy the earth. What? No, forget the dinosaurs, they're too much trouble, and besides, we've got to have something to confuse future societies with.

c) You have all sinned! You have fornicated and sodomized and gotten drunk and worshiped false idols. You have sworn and romped around naked and let your women speak, you must all DIE! That's what happens when you disobey GOD'S WORD! Didn't think it would happen did you? You thought I was some big pussy! Not you Noah you can stay.


Tuesday, May 09, 2006

I'll take the full blame for this one.

Oh no, we're doing it again. I just can't seem to help ruining men's lives. This time by being too slutty.

Adam Skrodzki, a tall, redheaded senior at the University of Maryland, bench-presses a respectable 280 pounds. He fights fires in Howard County as a volunteer and plans to join the Secret Service in the fall. In short, he's a man's man.
Yeah, I bet he is. (smirk)

Or so he thought until last fall, when he hooked up with a sophomore -- at her urging.

The girl really wanted to make a go of it with him. On learning earlier that he had no interest in pursuing a relationship, she had offered to be his "friend with benefits," and he had agreed. In his mind, that decision was a no-brainer.

But on this night, their first in bed, his body was telling him something else. She used every trick she knew, with no success. Adam panicked.

Oh no. Impotence. And from a man's man. There's something very sinister going on.

Skrodzki is far from alone. It seems that for a sizable number of young men, the fact that they can get sex whenever they want may have created a situation where, in fact, they're unable to have sex. According to surveys, young women are now as likely as young men to have sex and by countless reports are also as likely to initiate sex, taking away from males the age-old, erotic power of the chase.

"I know lots of girls for whom nothing is off limits," says Helen Czapary, a junior at the University of Maryland. "The pressure on the guys is a huge deal."

Bitches fault, bitches fault! Men obviously like it better when a woman has never been with another man, doesn't have a clue what she's doing, and really doesn't even want to be there.
Combine performance anxiety with binge drinking and the abuse of drugs on campus and it's no wonder that problems are showing up at college clinics in numbers that give the lie to the adage that impotence is reserved for the old (Bob Dole) or crazy (Jack Nicholson in "Carnal Knowledge"). The younger models who now appear in commercials for Viagra and its pharmaceutical clones reveal that the drug makers know (hope?) what the rest of us don't: Some members of the Game Boy generation are losing their game.

In certain young men, impotence can be a result of diabetes, cardiovascular disease or other organic problems. But for students such as the ones Brodie and other mental health professionals see, experts point to lifestyle. An increasing number of students arrive on campus taking antidepressants, some of which reduce libido and sexual function. They consume larger amounts of alcohol at one time than in years past, killing performance. Smoking, lack of exercise and anxiety also may be factors.
Well yeah we know that these guys are boozing, drinking and taking drugs, and just possibly that they're more likely to admit having erectile problems than men in the past were, all things which would explain increased instances of erectile dysfunction among young men, but let's not focus on that, let's focus on an idea I pulled out of my ass.

Demands by their female partners also contribute, according to educators such as Robin Sawyer, who teaches human sexuality at the University of Maryland. Sawyer recalls a young man who came to his office after class one day confessing that he hadn't been physically aroused in more than two years. "He was 20 years old, good-looking," Sawyer says. "I told him once he was in a relationship, things would get better. He said he could never get to the relationship because when he went out with a woman, she wanted to have sex almost immediately. He never got comfortable enough to tell them he had a problem, so he stopped dating."

So if unmarried young women were all still virgins this would somehow work out better, she simply wouldn't know he's supposed to get hard for sex. Of course this man never got to the point where some slutty bitch demanded he be rock hard for her all the time, he was afraid it would get to that point. Could it possibly be that it's society and not sexually confident women that is to blame for a man feeling insecure about his problem? You know the one that's all about men being manly men's men, where the sex act revolves entirely around the mighty cock and if it doesn't work you're, not quite literally, fucked?

And if it isn't clear enough, the article reminds us that the aforementioned sex act is about men being men, in a manly way.
Note the use of the politically correct acronym for erectile dysfunction. No physician or therapist would think of using the word impotence because its literal meaning -- lack of power -- is precisely the possibility their clients fear the most. Think of the way Salvador Dali painted a soft watch, proud possessor of time, drooped over a barren tree, " ". Such images disturb because sexual performance is still, in the minds of many males, the sign of authority and dominance, perhaps the last such symbol in a society slogging its way toward gender equality.
And of course men must have at least some kind of dominance over their lessers, or they're not manly men's men.

Those in the first years of testing their manhood may particularly see it that way.

When the tools work, there's nothing like it, says Devin Jones, a sophomore at Maryland, who read several how-to books about sex before going all the way with his first girlfriend. "When she got an orgasm, I felt like the man," he says in an interview, pounding his fists on his chest. Will Skelton, who graduated from George Washington University last year, says good sex "is all about self-worth. If you know you're a helluva lover, you're more confident with women and men."

Um, a question for male readers, I hope it's not too personal. When a woman orgasms during sex, do you ever get the urge to pound your fists on your chest? I'm only asking because no one's ever done this in my presence. Probably because I'm a loudmouth bitch.

There's more there but this is getting too long already, and you probably won't bother to read through it all, if you care too read the whole article.

via Pandagon.

Monday, May 08, 2006

A blue train.

A blue train.
Originally uploaded by Mutant Cat.
It's a train, it's blue. I took this photo yesterday, taking advantage of a warm and sunny spring day. I wanted to take more but my batteries gave out kind of quickly.

I had a good day, apart from being horribly insulted by a fuckbag shithead waiter who I quite rightfully lambasted for being a lazy shit for not bothering to serve me. Instead of grovelling at my feet apologising profusely for his pathetic failure at doing a simple job, he made some crack at me about "women's problems". So I'm currently trying to figure out the best way to get him fired, get him killed, or just get him to experience horrible pain somehow. I'm leaning towards something involving knives.

I stink. I don't mean that in a "I'm not a lovely person" sort of way, as I feel my fantasies of revenge are totally fair. I mean I stink as in I smell bad. I spent the night with my gentleman friend last night and haven't been home yet, so all the sweat, the sweat and other stuff from yesterday is still on my body, just sitting there and getting staler. I plan on having a shower at some point.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Stephen Colbert nude.

Sorry, couldn't resist.

Update from yesterday. The dude showed up and everything is cool. I did a lot of running around and a lot of waiting and I was fucking exhausted but everything is in it's place now. That little saga is over, bring on the next one!

It's a quite lovely day today. I'm feeling refreshed and invigorated, I finally got some sleep though I was kind of rudely awakened this morning by a lost person needing to be helped out. He didn't call too early so it's forgivable.

I might go out in a bit and wander around, maybe even take some more photos. Then again I might stay in here on the computer all day.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Well whadda you know?

That was a complete waste of time.

Give me a break.

Today is the big day. My new roommate shows up in a few hours. I think. He's taking the train from Bratislava to Prague, the last email said he should be in Prague (not sure which station) at 3pm, but he would email me before leaving Bratislava with all the details.

So I looked in my inbox this morning and lo and behold what did I find? Nothing! Well not nothing, there was a bunch of comment confirmations, some Flickr mail, an email from my brother and junk, but no this guy. A bit of a setback but I figured I would just check the train timetables and find out exactly when and where this train from Bratislava would be coming. I had to sort through a bunch of useless touristy sites first but I found it. The closest match was a train coming to Prague at 3:25 at a different station than the one I'd expected.

My plan is to go and meet that train. I really don't know how likely he is to be on it, or how I'll recognize him, no idea if he has a clue what I look like, but I'll go. It's all I can do. I asked him to please call me whenever he gets this email if he's running late, or if plans have changed, as I probably won't be online, no idea if he will or not.

There's always the chance that he won't show up at all, that he's changed his mind, that it was all a big joke to begin with and I'll be left with the entire rent burden. Or he could just be late. I got no fucking idea. This is a problem, I don't like these kinds of uncertainties.

There is something else bothering me too, actually much more than this, but I don't want to get into that now. It certainly doesn't help that I've got this bullshit to worry about on top of it though.

Friday, May 05, 2006

I actually prefer ice-skating.

I thought I'd take the advice of Norbizness and have myself a photo captioning contest, as he's so wise and cool. That and I can't think of anything else to do, but instead of scouring the internet for a suitable photo, I thought I'd use one of my own.

What do you make of this?

paratrooper cow

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Sound like someone you know?

Word of the day for Thursday May 4.2006

wag \WAG\, noun:
A humorous person; a wit; a joker.

The master of ceremonies was one Boston, a noted wag, and the occasion seemed to promise the greatest facetiousness.
-- Francis Bret Harte, The Luck of Roaring Camp

Yet the fate of all three reformers was more or less the same. Washington remained much as it had been before. ("Only more so," a wag might add.)
-- Jonathan Rauch, Government's End

Some wag has summed up the three laws of thermodynamics in everyday terms: 1. You can't win. 2. You can't even break even. 3. You can't get out of the game.
-- John Gribbin with Mary Gribbin, Almost Everyone's Guide to Science

Wag in this sense perhaps comes from the obsolete wag-halter, "a rogue; one likely to be hanged."

Interesting though, that they didn't include the other meaning of wag, the "that which a dog does with it's tail" definition. I don't know why. Seems like a poor kind of dictionary that would leave it out.

Just so you know

I found someone to share the flat with. He's not exactly here at the moment, as far as I know he's in Dublin right now. I'm to pick him up from the main train station on Saturday to take him to his new home, as he doesn't know Prague at all.

So, you've probably figured out from the previous paragraph that my new roommate is a he, and that I don't know him. Apart from that all I know about him is that he's from Los Angeles and has a German sounding name. Whether or not he's an axe-wielding psychopath I'm yet to discover.

It's quite busy at Hlavni Nadrazi, (mains train station) so it will be a bit difficult to find each other. I don't know what point to tell him to meet, as he won't know the place, and I don't really know the place myself too much. I should at least send him a photo, so he can identify me, unless of course he's followed the link on the bottom of his emails, visited this blog and then my Flickr photos. In which case he may be reading now, so hi new roomie! We'll figure it out somehow.

I'm feeling better now about things, as I have someone to share the rent now, though I'm still slightly annoyed. My landlord isn't being as helpful as I thought he was. I think he means to be, but he's just a little confused. I'm sure we'll sort it all out, but he needs to listen to me, and heed what I say. And agree and do things my way dammit!

I'll be ok.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

No banana Wednesday

After a week's break, Wednesday Bible Study is back. This is where I take a random bible verse and give it 3 different translations. Here is today's.

REV 2:16... "Repent; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will fight against them with the sword of my mouth."
He he. Cool. Ok on with the lesson.

a) Look, you just did something bad okay, so you have to like, you know say that it was bad and ask for forgiveness, bla bla bla, or else, or else, I'll do something really really bad.

b) Hey, this aint no banana baby, watch out!

c) Quit being gay, or else!

First of all I'd like to let you know that I really have no idea what this verse says, or what the greater context is so this is mostly an exercise in ass excavations.

Second of all, I know, I know, enough about the bananas already! I promise this is it. No more.

I mean I've really milked it for all it's worth haven't I? I've sucked all of the life giving force out of that joke. I've peeled back the skin to reveal the inner mushy goodness of the er, ok I really am running out of juice now.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Not sure if I'll get over this.

I was enjoying quite a pleasant evening yesterday. It was warm and the sky was a beautiful deep blue as I met my sweetheart by my beloved fountain. I was happy to see Clive, who was back from his travels, spurting away.

We strolled along the tree-lined streets, which were all the more charming due to the lack of people who'd fled the city for the long weekend, chatting amiably. I had my camera with me, so I took photos of some of the scenery on the way.

Our destination was Delvita, the supermarket. We got a cart and entered the fruit and vegetable section, picked up a few things, admired the vibrant ripe tomatoes and other fresh produce we encountered, when I saw it.

My nightmare


What a nightmare! No, not bananas. They're so long and smooth and curved, just perfect to grip in your hand, and their, (gulp) pointy end, just the right shape for the mouth, and no, no, I can't take it, they (***%#) HAVE A TAB THAT ALLOWS YOU TO PEEL THEM WITHOUT THEM SQUIRTING ALL OVER YOUR FACE!!!!!

I was having such a great day up to that point.