Day of rest.

It's like my last Sunday.. until.. well a little more than a week from now. Yes, I know it's Tuesday, but no rehearsal.. no work, well not much of that now, more on that later..

starting tomorrow it's rehearsal every day until the show, then the show, then the filming. Well except for Friday, and.. no, that's it. And after the filming I'll be..

I'll be.. um. Well we'll see. Let's just get through this first.

Fuck.. it's like.. next week!

So... this play I'm in starts what can technically be called next week now and I do't know about anyone else but I don't feel ready, or close enough to ready for 3 or 4 rehearsals to make me so. Of course, I have a tiny tiny role that you can't really fuck up but if anyone can do it.. well probably not me I'm usually good at getting through these kinds of things.. even if I"m a bit.. iffy.

The one thing about having a tiny role that doesn't matter is that although your role is tiny and doesn't matter so no one really gives you specific directions and they don't bother rehearsing parts that you have something kinda difficult to do properly.. is that when you miss a cue or screw up or injure someone while dragging them across a hard floor you're still a fucking idiot for fucking it up and even more so because you have hardly anything to do all these other people have tons of stuff they need to remember and you have hardly anything and you can't even do that!!!

Well it's not exactly like that.. but it could be. All the major big rehearsals are all ahead of me so I'll see.

It's good for you.. really it is..

As part of these rehearsals I've been going to for this play that's on that I'll be in, we do a series of warm up exercises. I kind of like them, while sorta not liking them, but I like that I'm doing them. We do mostly the same stuff every week, with a few variations, and I've bee trying to do at least some stretches and whatnot every day, and only this past week did I succeed in doing them every day, I think it's helping.. slowly, but it's helping.

For some reason today, when I'd finished the warm up my arms were fucking killing me! I couldn't figure it out.. the same ones we do every week but it had never been this painful.. I suppose it's all good, if it hurts it means you're doing it, but I'm just hoping that it isn't all to painful tomorrow and therefore I don't feel liked doing any exercises so I don't do any exercises and because I didn't do any exercises the one day I'll get out of the habit yes it is that easy to get out of the habit of this sort of stuff and I'll quit doing it. That's the problem here. I'm kind of determined to keep battling through this even if it's painful but determination doesn't necessarily help with me.. I mean, I'm determined now, as I sit here, writing about it...

Post Rehearsal Post

That is, the post about the period in which I am post rehearsal.

Let me try it again.. I had rehearsal today, now I'm post rehearsal, and this is the post about that.

Ok, so this is the rehearsal for the play I'm in.. did I mention I'm in a play? Yeah, might have. It's been a while since I was last cast, and also since the first meeting of the cast.. and I was wondering if I was really part of this at all or if anything was even happening, but finally it's getting going. I'm part of something! It's quite a nice feeling.

So feeling tired, very physical play and as well as all the physical parts of rehearsal there was a lot of warming up and getting in the mood exercises which were quite physical.. might actually be a bit fit by the end of this run...

met a lot of people, met some people I know and have seen every so often over the years, and even acted with, explored places I'd never been. Quite productive day really.

And I wait another day...

Ok so it's that time o the week... classes are done, I did it again yesterday and I thought it went pretty well and then I go the usual instructions.. stop being so repressed, uptight, dull and.. you know..

oh I went to class last night by the way.. that other thing, you know the one I mentioned.. did I mention it? Well there was this other thing that I was going to mention if I didn't mention and that is that we're finally up to filming a bit of this film I'm part of. We're shooting the first scene, were shooting the first scene on Wednesday night. Well.. we didn't, it was postponed due to whatever, to Thursday night, which is now. Of course I'm not there now.. I was on my way there, sorta, ready to meet some cats from the class for "rehearsal" with all my stuff ready to take there afterwards, and I get an sms saying can't do it tonight how about Sunday? So supposedly Sunday is the next try for.

I mean whatever.. I ended up walking around the city with the one person who showed up for "rehearsal" and taking some quite nice pics if I may say so, so it's not the hugest problem but it is vexing. I'm all revved up to do some proper acting stuff like you know.. or at least be on something filmed, rather than just talking nonsense at people, meeting with people intending on kinda filming something, going to doomed castings and doing interviews that are never seen for people who don't think I'm a good enough actor to be in their show thingy which never ends up happening anyway.

*breathes*

Looking forward to the weekend now.

Right that's it! Maybe..

Acting. I'm done with it, once and for all! Ok, not really but I thought that earlier today, for about a minute. Maybe about 30 minutes. I was rehearsing some scenes for the short film I'm doing. We're filming again on Monday and Tuesday and there are still some scenes that need to be rehearsed.

I was first humbled by the mention in a during rehearsal chat about last weekend's filming. Some scenes just didn't come out good enough and had to be cut out or dubbed over, because my lines were said shit, basically. Something like that. I was feeling alright about everything up to that, but that brought back the whole not good enough and feeling like the director is way regretting that he chose me for the role feelings.

The rehearsal itself was full of me saying everything flat and wrong and not being able to get simple stuff right. Ok maybe that's just me exaggerating, but he picked on some very specific stuff, the inflections of my words for instance. It was kind of... well it just seemed like I couldn't do anything any good. For a while. Then he spoke more about the scenes he didn't like so much from last week and it wasn't just me, but everything at the time so I felt a little less shit about that, but then there were more specific problems with everything I was doing.. really simple shit that shouldn't be a problem for someone who considers themselves an amateur but at least moderately adequate thespian... or so I think. Maybe he's just a nitpicker. Maybe I'm just being expected to do shit that doesn't make sense in way that doesn't work. Maybe I just don't have enough experience, maybe I'm lazy, maybe I just suck.

Anyway, I've got this one to finish. Rehearsal tomorrow, then Sunday again. Filming on Monday, Tuesday, probably a bit of Wednesday and then we might still have more scenes to do. We'll see.

Oh and I have my nude/semi-not so sure how-nude scene to do. I get out of the bath and put a towel on, he asked if it would be a problem and I said it should be ok but watch me freak out when I have to do it. I don't know.. I wanna be professional and whatnot but.. well, again, we'll see.

Overall it was ok actually. I don't want to give the impression that today was bad at all :)

Where is my mind..

I had so much to say about the rehearsals I had on the weekend, the one for the film I'm actually acting in, but I forgot all the interesting stuff. Oh well it was just interesting to me anyway.. something like the difficulty of having to hit the spot while acting simultaneously curious, scared but not that scared, kind of aloof and some other things.. but that's acting for you, it's good that I'm finally getting a bit of practice at this whole so called "skill" :). And it's turning out a positive that we're rehearsing in the actual space.. it takes me that long to get the movements right, without even thinking of being in character.. ah to be a professional..

I saw duckies! Nothing to do with what I was just saying, but I went for a walk and saw baby duckies.. awwww.. you know it's spring now. I also saw a rather cute member of the parrot family, or whatever family birds that are sort of parrot-esque belong to, a colleague of my boyfriend's moved into the flat that used be my "office" after the previous occupant had to leave suddenly so we went to see it, it was interesting seeing a place that was so familiar to me done up so differently.. well anyway, she has a bird.

And speaking of colleague's and boyfriend's and work stuff that other people do, he's leaving for Singapore soon, for a month. It's cool I suppose, for him. I was kinda looking forward to May but whatev.. people have lives I suppose. Other people.

That's pretty much all.

Mutant Cat's wacky adventures..

Oh shit I've built it up too much. It's not that interesting really.

I was just on my way to "rehearsal", which is really practise in this Meisner thingy I'm doing. We are supposed to have these rehearsals regularly to prove that we're all dedicated and stuff, so I went to meet this guy at the park in Karlovo Namesti at 4:30. I hopped on a tram at about 4:22, easily enough time to get there, as it isn't far. Usually.

For some reason today the tram just wouldn't move. Well it did, but then it stopped. For a long time. When it got to Namesti Miru, the stop just down the road about 5 minutes later a lot of people got off. I thought, I ain't getting off this thing, I've already committed myself to going on the tram and I'm gonna get there on the tram dammit!

I changed my mind as soon as the doors closed and decided then that I wanted to get off and walk, but being a tram in motion, at least officially if not in the traditional sense of the word, that being "moving", the doors were closed. So I had to wait until we got to I.P.Pavlova, the next station which is a couple of metres from the Namesti Miru. During that time I got a message from the guy I was meeting, telling me exactly where in the park he was, so I wrote back saying that I was stuck on a slow tram, and would be there soon. He wrote back saying he was going to go ahead and start his activity. Brilliant.

It took about 10 minutes to move between those two stations. As soon as it stopped and opened the doors I ran out, and had to wait to cross the road as the light just went green for the cars as I got there. I waited, and crossed the road, then I ran until the next crossroad where naturally, the cars started moving just when I got there.

I took off my shoes, my little heeled sandals which are no good for walking in, let alone running in, and took off the overshirt I was wearing, oh and did I mention it was hot? It was hot. I ran, barefoot carrying my shoes, my shirt and my bag on the dirty hot street.

I got there pretty quickly, feeling hot and flushed with a red face and no shoes, and dived straight into what was supposed to be my door but was really just me coming straight from running barefoot in the heat. We rehearsed and went home. The end.

I told you it wasn't that interesting.