Monday, November 11, 2013

Working Day

It's Monday, yet again and time to get to work!

Yes, I'm getting to that. Not, work necessarily, as in going to a location where I perform tasks which it has been heretofore agreed upon that I will do for the benefit of receiving a certain amount of money for a specific period of time, or per task or group of tasks. Nor is it work in the sense that I do a particular thing that is of use to someone somewhere for which I receive again, a certain amount of money etc etc.. and make a habit of it, ie, what is often referred to as "working for oneself". No, it's neither of those kinds of work. Important point being, no money is procured out of any of this.

It is also not work in the sense that I'm trying to, by way of modern forms of communication find out if well.. anyone out there, who's willing and able to pay, needs the application of skills I am in possession of. No, not doing that. I should be, in fact, I intend to be all the time, it just somehow doesn't happen.

This Monday (as most Monday are) has been more of a.. well, thinking about getting those particular things done and feeling worse about not doing them and worrying more, than I do say, by Thursday or so. It shouldn't really make a difference. The few and far between listings of anything I could actually do, which is also something that doesn't require a whole lot of or (or usually any) experience or qualifications which I usually (let's just say never) don't have, which is also something that I'm confident enough about being able to do that I won't definitely screw it up due to nerves, and just as I'm starting to feel ok about it, and I'm being stupid about being so paranoid they're going to dump me any minute, I get the gentle message that.. sorry dear, it's not working out can show up any day of the week, though not many weeks, as one might imagine.

So yeah, didn't do that. I did clear the computer a bit though, swept the floor a bit, and edit some photos, and I wrote this so the fact I didn't work, look for work, edit any of the about 20 by now videos, movies or shows we've filmed, do any language practice, go out into the world and walk, take photos or anything, look up monologues, classes, read something educational, make lists about all the things I should be doing so I remember to do them and allocate days or times for particular things so I don't feel like I should be doing all of it in one day so I never do any of it.. is.. um, where was I? Yeah.

I think I need to use shorter sentences. I think I'm confusing myself.

51 comments:

Ronald said...

I'm lazy too. So lazy I'd never write a post like this :)

Michelle said...

well I'm too lazy to write a post like this, way too lazy.. still, I managed to type a large number of characters in one particular space, I guess it's something

Ronald said...

James Joyce wrote a whole fucking book ( a huge one too ) and couldn't be arsed to punctuate it! It's called Finnegan's Wake, and amazingly, some call it Art! Dunno about you, but Itend to call those who don't punctuate, ignoramuses!

Michelle said...

punctuation is kind of important, I mean some kinds, everyone has their peeves, but I am usually only bothered by stuff that makes something hard to read, like no commas or full stops or anything, and lack of paragraph breaks..

looking at the previous paragraph it looks like a lot of text in one bunch, so, I'm possibly being a little hypocritical, but that it might look like that because it's all in a little box.. hmmm

Michelle said...

ok, it doesn't look so bad now it's posted

Ronald said...

Little, or no punctuation, irks me because I'm too lazy to work out what's meant. It hurts too.

Ronald said...

I felt sorry for this particular comment thread, so I thought I'd inject some life into it with a few words. Here goes...

Erm... I really must change my pic here on Blogger. The current one is a few years old now, and I can't claim to look so youthful. What a difference a few short years make!

Michelle said...

yes.. let's get a more recent photo of you.. though, I'm sure you're being modest and you look as charming and vigorous as ever..

then again what would I know.. I haven't seen a more recent pic of you!

Ronald said...

As long as you promise not to be honest, to help fuel the myth of, "guys get sexier as they age". Sounds like I'm fishing... I'm not. I don't take compliments anyway. I'm peculiar like that. I'm the kind of man who doesn't want to join any club that would want him as a member! Gosh, I'm rambling! Getting all self-conscious and stuff.

Michelle said...

I promise I'll say something nice.

Ronald said...

Aaarrrggghhh! Not "nice", I'm allergic to it!

Michelle said...

ok, I won't say anything nice..

happy?

Ronald said...

Purring. You're so nice :-)

Michelle said...

should I take offense at that?

*gets a bit confused and stuff*

Ronald said...

I confuse myself * continues confusing his self *

Michelle said...

huh?

Ronald said...

Ooops! I didn't answer your, "should I take offense at that?", question. No, of course not. Did you?

Michelle said...

I don't think I did but I'm quite confused at the moment.

Ronald said...

Sorry. I guess I'm trying to say, I'm not comfortable with compliments because I feel I'm not worthy. But I do appreciate you having been around all these years, and actually speaking to me. It speaks for itself.

Any better?

Michelle said...

oh yes, I get it, and thanks, that's lovely..

very nice.. ;)

*ducks*

Ronald said...

* Donald ducks * Arf!

Seriously, I've not one person online who has your longevity, epal-wise that is. And given how fussy and easily disinterested I can become, that's a huge compliment. You're not just a pretty-face, you're interestingly daft too!

Michelle said...

well.. that is really sweet :)

is sweet ok? can I say that?

Ronald said...

Here's my beef - kittens and puppies are sweet! I wanna be cool, and ever so slightly dangerous, in an appealing way.

Consider the male ego!

Michelle said...

ok I will in future be very careful and treat your fragile ego with tender care, pale pink soft padding paper and stick a sign on it so those burly delivery guys with the big hands don't throw it about like they are wont to do..

Ronald said...

Those burly guys you speak of have the most fragile egos of all, generally speaking. I'd be in good company. We could speak of our mutual fragility and comfort each other?

Michelle said...

Yes, you can start a support group even.

Ronald said...

I'll go break the news to the guys forthwith, I'm sure they'll welcome the idea!

Michelle said...

Good. I hope you have a rewarding relationship.

Ronald said...

I'm sure those rough, crude sounding and burly guys are pussycats really. Thoughtful, sensitive, caring... but to be on the safe side, I think I'll stick around here...

Michelle said...

well.. it seems like you're happy there so, you do that

Ronald said...

Really? Without the use of supplementary emoticons I give off an air of happiness? Just goes to show what a great writer I am.

* allowing myself the use of a single, aforementioned emoticon *

:-)

Michelle said...

perhaps I used too strong a word.. relatively content? is that correct?

but you can be happy if you want to be

Ronald said...

I'm sure you know me well enough to know, happiness, in my book, is way too vague a concept. Besides, I think those smug, self-satisfied bastards are happy. Grrrr... that revolution can't come quickly enough.

Michelle said...

yes.. enough nonsense about happiness, being happy, what it means to be happy..

how bout this revolution.. how does one plan one? and what exactly, is this revolution about?

er.. what do they have revolutions for?

Ronald said...

That doesn't matter, the important thing is to get it rolling, then we can create a reason why as we go along. Just be sure to get those uniforms done on time!

Michelle said...

yes, sir!

er.. commander whatever your title is..

*meets with costume dept*

Ronald said...

Maybe the 'energy' going out of our conversations. It's to be expected, especially as we've been at it a long time. I'm very used to this, being an inveterate user of chat platforms. Marathon sessions are very tricky after awhile, as overused minds turn into a kind of soppy porridge. At least that's how mine goes anyway.

Michelle said...

you are right.. we may have exhausted this.. um, what do you call it.. subject doesn't seem like the right word for this particular place on the internet with these words..

this whatever.. we may have or may be very close to exhausting it whatever it is

Ronald said...

I've taken off my robe (don't panic, I'm clothed underneath) and my body temperature has lessened considerably, so now I feel more comfortable. I'll put up with the cold feet! Anyways, I'm able to stay longer, but of course, it takes two to tango. For the record, you're a delight to talk to.

Michelle said...

thanks.. yeah I'm still around, doing some other stuff in between reading comments and commenting.. but strangely always seem to have something to say..

Ronald said...

It must be because I'm an inspirational guy. Seriously, I know one truth about conversation, online or otherwise - you're only as good as the person you're talking to. So thanks. Now if that don't make you fucking blush, I don't know what will!

Michelle said...

ok ok that's enough.. jeez

*doesn't blush, totally doesn't blush*

Ronald said...

Hehe. you don't like it either.
* files away this important knowledge, for future use *

Michelle said...

it's not that I don't like it.. it's just.. whatever.. don't care..

*looks all nonchalant and stuff*

Ronald said...

Aaah... "whatever", meaning, "indifferent"? I've never quite understood that word, though it's ever popular in this country now.

Michelle said...

well.. it's something I say probably way too much, although I often shorten it to whatevs.. I guess it's kind of obnoxious, and juvenile.. though perhaps it's kinaa teenagey for teenagers of at least a few years more than 10 years ago, which is old by now but still way too recent for me to be a teenager or even 20 something post teenager..

still, I use it, usually means I can't think of anything worthwhile to say, I think

Ronald said...

Which probably means I got ya flummoxed. Yay!

Michelle said...

well.. no, just.. yeah..

whatev who cares..

Ronald said...

Just teasing, what might be called "gentle banter", nowt else. I know you're up to it :)

Michelle said...

yes yes, of course..

I could do it all day ;)

Ronald said...

I'll have to get you back on my gtalk list. I'm not sure why I took you off, but I guess it was during one of my "purges". I'm like that.