Saturday, November 09, 2013

*unblocks the block*

I'm not sure if I ever actually had writer's block. I don't ever have trouble writing something if I could be bothered to do it, I always manage to type some letters that form words which sometimes but my no means always form some sort of coherent thought, it's just that. Well.. when I write, it's usually just me, typing some letters that are squashed together in words which actually most of the time, don't form thoughts that are very coherent to anyone but myself, and sometimes not even to me. When they are clear, concise and.. crisp, they're pretty boring like.. me talking about how I'm not doing anything and don't want to write in depth about how I'm feeling or about stuff that matters and if I am doing stuff then I really don't want to write about that just because and instead I write about not really having anything to write.

Don't know if that's writer's block. More.. I dunno, a giving a shit block, or opening myself up block, being able to impart meaning, even the tiniest bit to a small part of the universe block. It's a block, but not that of the act of typing letters to form words etc etc etc.

I used to have stuff to write about. Long long ago. Whether it was directly about myself, ideas based on things I experienced or just.. anything, I used to get ideas while I was falling asleep, and write a post in my head that was, at the time of thinking it out, quite brilliant, and of course I lost all the best bits by the writing down, but I had ideas.. themes, things to say that wasn't just.. I did this today, or I didn't do anything today so I thought I'd tell you.. just, stuff. I'm sure it's all there in the archives.. way back, it's at least 4 or 5 years since I've been doing the latter.. but even that, 2 or 3 years ago though what I wrote was far from brilliant or even worth putting out there, at least I did, and I wrote something slightly different from week to week, if not necessarily every day.. it just seems as I wasn't as shit at this as I am now, have been for a long time.

Maybe it is writer's block. If one takes writing in any way seriously, then I guess it is. It's just been a damn long one.


Ronald said...

Well, you know my thoughts on writers-block... I believe it's simply the "inner critic" getting the upper hand, telling the author everything he writes is shit! Though I concede, there may be other explanations, like you say, being unable to "open up" emotionally. In my case, I'm willing to pour my heart out, but my inner-critic tells me people will shun me, that no one is interested in a whingeing, melancholic! So I either stay well away from blogging or, I meet it halfway, and try injecting a little humour to make it more palatable. Even so, even repressed writing is an outpouring of ourselves, which is always scary!

Michelle said...

Yes it's always kind of scary, which is why I often write in this kind of babble.. the other reason is, that's how I think.. but I've been trying to write more just anyway recently because, well, I like to. So hopefully something will come of this.

Ronald said...

Yes, you often lapse into this special kind of writing and I've always kind of known why, cuz I'm amazingly perspicacious :) Anyway, writing (anything) is always better than not writing, that's for sure, but in your case, you have a safety-valve, a substitute... your photography. Not sure if you know it, but you're pretty damn good! Jus' so's you know!

Michelle said...

aw shucks.. thanks, yes, there's always the photo post out there, I try not to clog up the blog with photo after photo but I do like to share those I like best with more o the internet people out there..