Friday, November 01, 2013

Ticking away...

It's November. That month, the 11th month o the year, the 2nd last of them all, the one that yours truly, myself, that is me, was born in. It was the latter part of the month, but, the fact is that before this month is up, another anniversary of the birth o me, is going to happen, and this time it will be on of the ones that has a zero at the end.

I've had a few of those already, more than enough, imho and well, it's not the first time I've felt that I'm ill equipped to move up in the decades but this one.. well, it's another one.

They say life begins.. I'll just let that sentence fizzle out like that, but they say that, or they used to, and I'd be quite happy if that was true but fuck.. just fuck!

I've been told I look younger, from a few years to the sort of claim you know people are being ridiculous and saying you look that young and they're complimenting you because it's so obvious you're so much older, but it's nice to know I don't look quite my age, and I'd be lying profusely if I claimed it wasn't predominantly for vanity reasons I'm having this whole episode, but mostly, well not mostly but largely, right along with all the other stuff it's just that I can't fucking believe I'm so fucking old! I mean, by mid 20s you start to feel you should be grown up, sorta.. by 30.. it's like.. ok, that's more grown up, or should be, but it's not because I'm not, but today, the 30s are like.. well, an extended 20s, then you're nearing the mid 30s, then you're 35, then you're in your late 30s and it still seems like fuck, there's no way I, me this dumb kid in a grown up body is that old..

and then you're going to be 40 at the end of the month and it seems like if you're not going to exhibit any, not one single signifier of being an adult, of being remotely responsible in any facet of your life, that you haven't achieved one fucking thing your entire life well.. you aint ever going to.

That's pretty much how I feel about the whole thing.

4 comments:

Ronald said...

Hahahahaha! You kids make me laugh :)

Michelle said...

I do realize there are people of more advanced age than I am who have been through this and similar 0 ages more times than I, then again back when I was 35, 30, even younger I was foolishly lamenting how old I was... ah.. if only I had just that to complain about now... no doubt in another couple of years I'll have a similar.. whatever you call it

Ronald said...

I remember when you were knee high to a wallaby, sporting fresh cheeks the colour of Australian Rosé wine :) But what's really important is, you're still as daft as you ever were. I can't praise you more highly than that!

Michelle said...

that is true.. as daft as ever, some of us simply never grow out of that..

it's good to know ;)