Sometimes I write about subjects. Usually I just write about stuff.
Yeah.. I've been going on about this Jan thing well.. all month.. the thing is that January is supposed to be a crappy month full of crappy stuff and crappy weather which is at best just unbearably dull and considerably irritating... and yeah, it's been that..
this was all done with..
Well.. luckily I don't live in Oklahoma..
OKLAHOMA CITY (AP) — A Republican state senator from Oklahoma City introduced a bill Tuesday that would ban the use of aborted human fetuses in food, despite conceding that he's unaware of any company using such a practice.
Yeah.. Jan is being a pain in the proverbial... stupid things, little things that you just feel like a pissy little whiner when you whine about them but they're whine worthy... being scolded by employers, screen going all fuzzy and difficult to read, the spare hard drive er.. smoking, people still not giving me answers to questions and others hounding me for the answers to those questions, long planned projects going awry.. you know the sort of thing..well maybe you do.. you probably know things equally vexing..
Now it seems to have snowed again, the last time I looked outside there was a light white cover on everything.. not sure if it's still there.
Been a pretty dull winter so far, haven't had much snow, yeah I like it.. I grew up somewhere it never snowed bla bla bla and well I like it. I mean, it's going to be winter, and cold, and overcast and drab leafless trees everywhere.. might as well be snow.
And there hasn't been. Until a few days ago and that went away pretty fast, and a bit earlier, no idea how long that will last.
is for people with money.. and patience, and skill.. and talent, and lots of time, and patients.. and did I mention money.. and the necessary equipment that money buys?
Oh yeah and patience, and skill.. some education in the art.
I suppose it's possible, indeed it's technically possible to make something without all those things, or any of those things, or any of them except for a very little patience and a want to do it, but to do it well. To build up a canon of work that you can be.. well, to build up a fair amount of work in a not endless amount of time..
well it's difficult. Finally got around to doing something we've been meaning to do every weekend since.. lats year some time, and not the end of the year, and technological difficulties came up again. It's always something.
I guess it's a learning experience.
January is as usual a pointless and dreary month, partly because of it being winter, partly because, well.. a lot of my life is kinda dreary and pointless. And there isn't even any snow..which is one thing I look forward to this time of year.
And I still haven't done any of the stuff I wanted to get done this early part of the year.. somehow it.. just doesn't happen. All my fault I know. Therefore not much going on, not much of interest to write, in fact, nothing, but still I write.
Maybe in 12 days things will be.. slightly different in a mostly positive way. Then again, probably not.
I'm doing it again. I keep putting these things off and off.. and now I've taken so long to do as little as write something down properly, and now I can't remember all the details I had in my head before, and of course, the way I remember it is totally brilliant, and sure I'll come up with something to replace it but it won't be the same, ie as amazingly brilliant as I remember thinking it was.. oh, and other stuff that I wanted to be done by now.
It's vexing!
Isn't that like, where babies go if they die? To lurk around forever, in a sort of no man's land? It seems unfair.. the babies don't really have a chance to prove if they're good or not and well.. perhaps they are really good but I suppose to God, being babies it isn't enough proof to him that they deserve to go to heaven.. therefore, they have to go to some totally sucky non place.. I mean at least adults who have been shits but.. ya know, they were proper(ish) Catholic shits go to Purgatory, which isn't permanent.. doesn't seem fair.
Rethinking it I suppose what I'm in is more like Purgatory.. though it's not much like either. Just one of those.. need to decide things, but can't until I have certain information which isn't coming through.. and they're taking long enough to answer me about even telling me what the deal is with the information.. and I'm getting some (albeit mild at the moment, though that may change) pressure to give answers.
Don't know if it's limbo, or purgatory.. or just mildly vexing. I think it's the latter.. still.
Is it always so damn cold whenever it's nice looking outside? It seems as if when it's overcast, or drizzling, it's relatively warm, but you don't really want to go out there anyway, because it sucks, and it would be reasonable because it's not actually freezing and your toes can tolerate it, and if I have a tour, I do't have a tour.. you know? I mean, if I go for a tour then no one shows up for one because of the drizzling or even light snow (not that there has been much of that) and there's no tour, although it would have been ok because.. as previously explained.. not fucking freezing, and so I don't get much money.
When it looks lovely outside.. er.. sunny. It's freezing! What's the point really.. it looks all pleasant and stuff but it like, isn't, it's really fucking uncomfortable to be outside for more than a minute and your toes freeze like today when I had a meeting for work which took up a fair chunk of my Sunday not that I'm complaining about that and it was largely outside and it was cold. I mean, I remember back when we used to have snow.. oh, last winter and when ti did it usually was warmer than this as well. Don't know why it does that but I'm afraid I don't approve. Sort it out!
So, the play. It's like official. Had the first meeting about it, with as many of the cast as could make it, yesterday. Woo hoo. It's happening. Don't start rehearsals til Feb, and there won't be so much for me as my role is one of the smaller ones, but I'm doing something!!!!
Now.. I need to work more on my stuff, this is what I've decided will be my big thing this year.. I am in one play, but there is no guarantee I'll be in anything more than that.. though if I do well in this, it may plunge my career into.. well.. doing a few more things than I've done recently, which would be fucking awesome... I'm still rather hyped, as far as I'm all excited about having it, not so much in the planning and writing and organizing and actually doing it part of doing it, but it's what I want.. lots and lots so.
Stay er.. tuned here, I spose.
20 more days and Jan will be over. Then, we can get on with stuff without stuff sucking so much. I surely do hope this hacking cough goes away considerably before the end of Jan.. like, 20 days earlier.. or so. Other stuff.. I can live with.. it's slow out there so there won't be so many tours, not the hugest tragedy tbph and really.. in past years, stuff hasn't improved so much on the 1st Feb, as far as I remember. Not that things really are that much crappier in January than other times of year.
Still.. JMG.
I can now get my emails up without the ugly digit only dates... 31/12/11.. etc, showing up automatically on the screen. I now have enough emails from this year to obscure those crude, unaesthetically pleasing dates. There are still many on the front page, haven't gotten that far yet, but.. as long as I can see them it's kay.
And it means there are fewer days of January left.
JMG!
Well actually it just means I've received enough emails, which could have happened in any number of days depending on how many emails I receive a day, but there are still fewer days left of Jan than there were.
I'm having trouble stocking up my larder.. for want of a better word.. ok I'll just call it kitchen. What exactly is a larder anyway, and how is it different than a kitchen? Anyway, not the point. No food here. Well.. there's food but I haven't managed, and neither has the other party sharing said kitchen/larder/parlour/whatever, to fully or at least respectfully stock it for a few days now, well, at all this year.
I was unable due to mostly laziness and another mildly vexing circumstance, before work, but I had an early enough. tour I'd be able to do it after. I finished my tour and was asked to do another one, after which it was too late to go where I'd originally meant to and.. so, nothing in the kitchen, well not literally nothing just much. And my cough is still lingering.
JMG
I have this horrible cough that won't go away. That's not so strange, it's just a fucking pain in the ass. I should be at the end of this cold thingy, but the cough isn't just lingering, it's really really bad and the worst of it should have been over at some point yesterday, leaving me with a bit of a cough that's mildly annoying but doesn't really get in the way of my day to day life too much.
At some point yesterday, I picked up my phone and the time and date was like, 3674 1/1/1/12.. or something. I think it's the Buddhist year.. which for some reason I can set my phone to, and tried it once, because I don't know what else it could be.. I hadn't reset it though, and it stayed like that for a second before reverting back to the regular time I have it set. Weird.
Later on the tram, I got confused, because my phone said 18:12 and the tram time said 17:42, I knew I'd checked both my phone ad the computer, and the time on the website for the tram times before leaving so I was pretty sure I did't have the time wrong, but still.. very odd. Turned out the tram time was wrong, I've never seen that before. What could it all mean?
I had a dream the other night that I was on stage singing a song, but I didn't know the words, so I sang really low, to disguise the fact I was mumbling. Wasn't received so badly, at least, all the bored, unimpressed faces seemed to be because it was a poor performance, not because they could tell I was faking.
The next night I dreamed I was on a passenger ship. I knew I needed to get off soon and swim the rest of the way, and didn't really want to, I found the thought unpleasant and was afraid of sharks, and quite frankly, wondered why this had never occurred to me before the numerous times before I had done this.
Does it explain anything? Would I want any of this to mean anything? Does any of it matter? When will this fucking cough go away?
Well?
Fuck it's already the 6th of 2012 and I'm still in not really doing shit mode. I missed getting too heavily into all this "stuff".. or "work" that I intend to do, you know.. the 1st or 2nd when the world goes back to work or whatever, I mean, I woke up with a terribly saw neck, and then I got sick... but, well, today's the day you take all your Christmas shit down.. I think, so this is another kind of official end to the holidays so if I don't start today I never will. I mean, not until later.
Of course, it's already evening, so I probably should get with it tomorrow.. except tomorrow's Saturday..
Oh fuck it.. this month is bullshit anyway.
25 days now.
So, I grumblingly, begrudgingly went to work last night. Felt awful, just your common cold, sore throat, very tired due to said sore throat.. nothing one can't live with but not something you want when you need to lead a group of people around outside at night, in winter, while being all entertaining and stuff.
Well it wasn't bad, cozy group of 6 people, they all seemed nice, and interested, no garbage truck turned up just as I was at the Golden Bears to drown me out.. was feeling a little tickly in the throat but it wasn't the worst. By the end of the tour it got bad, part cold air, strong wind, and bad air down in the creepy catacombs, by the time I was done my throat was terrible, my body weak and sore.. and to make it all just fucking wonderful, the tram was just crowded enough that the 2 women who shoved before me just a few seconds before the tram came, got the last seats left. I really needed a seat.
Today I'm better, I think, at least better than I was when I came home, throat not as bad, bit sniffly, and will be sneezy but at least I can hang around here all night, so I have a chance at recovering.
Of course, tomorrow I've got to go wandering around the Castle up on the freezing, windy hill for 3 hours.
JMG.
JMG!
Yeah yeah, blah blah blah, 2012, new year.. whatever. Despite all the excitement of a new number to put after the 20, it's still the month of fucking January. Yes, the JMG campaign is back on... 28 days left of this shit, and I've already had enough!
So.. have a few hours after midnight of watching some fireworks, enjoying the spectacle, dancing a bit though they did have a really big stretch of totally sucky music at the 80s and 90s party.. after midnight of course, strike number 1 I guess that was.
The next day I woke up with a terrible pain in my neck, couldn't turn my head and couldn't move at all without hurting.. fortunately, someone covered my tour that night, so this particular strike wasn't as bad as it could have been, but still.
Was better yesterday, though it still hurt and I did work last night, thought it went ok, and it was relatively warm, and I was underground for this tour so I didn't think I was out in the cold too much, but still, after I got home I started to feel a tickle in my throat. I hoped it wouldn't lead to a full on sore throat, which leads to a general cold/flu, 4 or 5 days of coughing, sniffling, sneezing and feeling generally shit but after a night of not sleeping in which is got progressively worse, I got up with a really sore throat. And I have to work tonight, and it's a late tour, and it's outside in the Old Town, and it's colder again today.
Jan Must Go.
The last year on earth. That's if you listen to the Mayans.
