I must get my own computer.
I've blogged before about the lack of privacy I have in this place, the home of my computer. I've gone on about W, it's co owner and his constant curiosity about every move I make. I've moved out, I have my own place, so why do I even hang around here when it's not strictly necessary for work?
Well being the home of my precious computer, I have no choice but to spend a lot of time here. Sure the work is kinda important, that brings money, but my blogging, my emails, my browsing of stuff of interest, that's what matters. These things are a major part of my life, I must have access to them.
So I'm stuck here, pretty much. If I had my very own computer, all mine, only mine, just for me, me, me, in my own place, I would hardly ever be here at all. My addiction to the internet is keeping me bound to this place, and that man you could say.
I need a computer so I don't have to come to this place at all, except for work hours, so I don't have to hear about all of his problems and how difficult his life is and how no one else has problems like him, or as mentioned before, listen and try to avoid answering a barrage of questions about everything I've been doing. Which is nothing, as I went home the night before after finishing on the computer and came here after waking and showering, to use the computer, but still the questions come.
And I could actually do my stuff in peace. I do get a lot of time alone here, to blog, to chat, to browse, but when he comes in he gets all curious and weirded out by what I'm doing. He can't understand this "blogging" thing, and can't understand that it isn't necessary for him to understand everything I do, I just like to do it. The way this place is set up there is a chair just behind the computer he likes to sit on, and when he's here, he plops himself in that chair, directly behind me, looking over my shoulder. Not literally, not all the time, but it feels like it.
Every now and again he sees something on the screen that he comments on. This really really pisses me off. It may not seem rational but I hate it! Then he thinks I'm being weird again, that I don't want him to see what I'm reading, which is true I don't, I just don't think it's weird, I'm doing what I want on the computer and I want to do it in privacy. He's not interested in the things I'm looking at and I don't care to explain it all to him.
Anyway I don't like it.
2.22.2006
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2 comments:
It's not that bad. I get to be here alone a lot of the time, and I can use my roomates computer quite often.
I actually have more than enough time on the computer, what I really need to do is find something else to do with my life. Then it wouldn't be such a problem.
I still do need the computer though, but again, that means a job. I really mean it this time.
In order to get online, I've had occasion to use public libraries recently, and what is noticeable, is the lack of privacy. Sure, it's okay for a quick peek at your inbox, and a look at your favourite blogster, but there's a distinct feeling of unease in such public surroundings. I don't know if you're like me, but an important part of the whole Internet experience is that it can be brought right into your home (in your case, and for the moment, the office). It's cosy, private, and personal. I'm sure, despite your exhibitionist tendencies, you don't want to be seen posting your pics to flickr being watched suspiciously by, on the one side, the old spinster from down the street, as she flicks through the surgical rubberware catalogue; and on the other side, the neighbourhood watch chairman, and secretary for the League of Decency, as he surreptitiously, peeks at the pic of the day on www.whatstrangethingsyoucanshoveupyourarse.com
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