Winter is melting...

Springs seems to be thinking about maybe tiptoeing upon us, but should be advised to bring some heavy rubber boots, cos all that those piles of dirty, icy, packed in snow need somewhere to go, and the city is a mess of puddles at the moment.

Yesterday I went to register with one of the larger casting agencies, after considering for some time that I maybe ought to do something like that. I'd like to excuse my fumbling and flubbing on the fact I did most of the interiew in Czech, but the recordings I did in English were just as bad so that topples that theory. I made a complete buffoon of myself for about the 86th time this year, and there have only been 56 days this year up to this point (and yesterday we were only up to 55) so I'm not doing badly in that area... Strangely enough during the photoshoot where I just stood smiling, looking angry, anxious, surprised, or just plain posing I did just fine.

Who knows what it will turn up. We'll see I suppose.

Parrticular grumble of the day..

#5.. or 50.. or 142.. who cares.

Every fucking time I come here people are smoking! And there's only 2 people in here.. one being me!

*grumble grumble computer grumble fucked up keys grumble people smoking grumble*

sigh

*hums indistinguishable tune*

so..things go on. Computer still dead.. sucks but I'm coming to terms with it. Still poor but able to eat and stuff. I have a potential other film coming up..nothing that pays which would be totally fucking useful right now but I can only hope for crumbs in these troubled times.. still, sounds fun and I need to be doing something.. yay and stuff. Met with the film dude on saturday and talked and we'll see where it goes. More info when I have it and/or more time/inclination to write about it.

weekend was nice.. getting warmer, almost up to 6°c today.. I know, it's quite astounding. It means to get warmer.

and.. well, not much else. In a cafe, on a wonky computer, one of the shift keys doesn't seem to work but at least this has english installed which is better than the last one I used. and there are people smoking here.

Oh well...

Actual Rain!

I think it rained last night. I looked out both windows this morning and the street out front and the yard seemed to have less icy snow pileup than I last remember. It's actually getting up to 3 degrees today, they've been telling us on the radio for the past week almost. It's very exciting. It's also overcast with possibility of rain but you can't have everything.

I think I'll post a picture.



There it is. A picture.

Grumble, grumble.. russm, frussm.

It has been said that February is now the new Jan.

Actually this is true of last year too.. which sucked seriously, in an awful way.

This Feb sucks in a different way, the mundane, nothing real big going on, small things though some of those things that in the greater scheme of things are not important are very important to you.

Computer still dead, that's the main thing. And it's going to remain dead, probably, it will be ages until I'm online at home anytime soon. *cries and stuff*

I had a slight problem with the other computer, you know the one that's useless for anything.. well, I made it useless for anything, realizing that I actually was depending on it quite a bit.. now that the actual useful comp which was fucked up and annoying to use but worked doesn't work. It was really stupid. I was trying in vain to find out how I could connect it to the internet, so I saved some stuff to take home and read them, found them useless but fiddled around anyway. I logged out, logged in again thinking well you never know it might renew the thingy and read my usb whatsit.. probably won't but what the hell it can't do any harm.

Well, all it did was make my desktop disappear. I couldn't access any of my folders or files, or even right click. All I could do was add stuff to the bar at the bottom whatever it's called. I could access stuff through Mozilla though, but couldn't do anything with it. I fiddled around, fucked around, screwed around, tried to type commands in the box thingy although I had to keep logging out and logging back into the program that didn't work to get it. I didn't know any commands, and the few I found were useless to me but I tried them. Did nothing. Then yesterday I was fiddling around more, tried adding another thing to the bar thingy although none of the programs I added there were usable and it fixed it somehow. So that's back. We're back to square one as they say, or rather -1 because the problem with the comp surpassed the fuckup with the updates and now the battery is dead. Or something, Maybe it's the motherboard. No idea.

So.. we had an exploding water heater on Sunday, that fixed itself and hasn't done anything again, but I spent half a day cleaning up the mess.. it had the decency to spill dirty water over just cleaned stuff and one of the cupboards. Something to do with my time.. but that's over with and I'm waiting for the next big fuckup. The minor ones aren't worth mentioning although I will now. The tv which I got out after being away for months doesn't seem to work, and I just broke one of the bulbs to one of the lights I have for photography and stuff.

And something else I just tried to do proved worthless.. meaning I will not get any money for even longer, and this computer is weird and has issues with the language, it wont stay on English, thats even if it has English.. and I cant type the apostraphe.. I keep getting §§§§§§. What the fuck is the use of that character.. I mean what the fucking use (insert question mark here.. and close bracket as well.. grrr/

Apart from that everything's great.

Modest is an understatement..

It's well known that my household and swanky celebrations.. ieValentine's day in fine restaurants don't mix.. well there was to be no such attempt this year, for more reasons than one. About a month ago we thought we'd go to a nice but not too swanky Italian restaurant.. then perhaps just go straight to the second place we went last year, where we spent the evening and had stinky cheese. Then it became a nice meal at home.

That's ok. Not so big on the partic holiday anyway.. but it's nice to have a good dinner and wine and stuff. It would be even more good if we could er... listen to music that we choose and watch something afterwards but THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN.

It would be nice to not have a computer that persists in being dead, oh by the way did I tell you the computer died.. and did I tell you the fix that was supposed to help didn't help and now there's another problem? Well, the computer died.. and did I tell you the fix that was supposed to help didn't help and now there's another problem.

Now it won't even start up.. we're aspiring to getting the blue screen of death now.

In other news we went on some nice walks this weekend. Now there's something that not having a working computer makes you do.

Turns out it's Windows fault.

You know the problem with the computer? It's a Window thing. Lot of people are suffering from it so I hear via sms from someone who has proper access to a computer. Damn them!

For a while I was relatively pro Windows, after the Linux debacle.. I came to realize that having stuff simple and shit really suits me. But this takes a few point off them. The comp is still out, and we'll try a few more things this evening.

The water went out too.. for a while. Just as I'd finished my shower.. the pressure went low and it's lucky I tried my best to get all the shampoo out before it completely went out cos that would have sucked.

I'd ramble on more but I don't have too much time in this cafe and the "s" key is fucked up.. it's pissing me off!

Oh fuck, fuck, fuck! *grumble grumble* fuck!

Well fuck! What do you fucking know the fucking computer just died. I mean died! Fuck! This time for real.. well I hope it might be restorable but it's worse than last time and last time sucked! And the other computer is still fucking useless as I've been able to do fuck all with it in all the months I've had it, you know the fucking one with the fucking mishmashed Linux system with no midnight commander. I thought I might try it again seeing as I'm more desperate now, but the cd with the details of how to install it is lost, and almost certainly dropped behind a cabinet that cannot be moved. Not that it makes a difference, otherwise I'd just be frustrated with reading all the jibberish.

Fuck. So I'm in an internet cafe, which sucks because the keyboard is all weird and I forgot my glasses. I picked one I know cos I know it has a usb port and I need.. I mean need to upload my photos which I'm sorta doing at the mo, of course I'm unable to edit them the way I like, fuck!

This is fucked I tell you. Fucked!

Slight change of pace.

I actually did something today. Kinda. It's not really doing anything by most people's standards but mine are rather low re "stuff" so yeah.

It was a casting, for voice work and I won't say more about what it's for because my reading was poor, I know reading straight off the page unrehearsed doesn't produce one's best work but I was poor, sucky, unconvincing, bland. So I won't be put on the list of people who are proper actors who we might consider for something some time, let alone on the call back list, let alone get the bloody thing but whatever it's good to do something again, get back into practice so that when I just so happen to go for something where they need someone very specifically like me with my looks and my accent and there absolutely is no one else I read well enough for them to say "well, she's kinda ordinary and on the poor side, but there isn't anyone else that looks right" rather than, "well, she's really the only human being in the universe that looks right for this part and no one else has that right sound.. but fuck was she shit... let's just rewrite the part". That sort of thing.

I read the girl's bit, which included being scared and weepy, and a calm, cool voice. The boys got to swear and yell and make threats, I wish I'd gotten to read those lines, I probably could have done it better too. Well that's life for you, women are victims and love interest and sometimes a disembodied voice over the radio. Seriously, this is what I'm talking about when I say sexism is real and happening right now.. and it AFFECTS PEOPLE!* I didn't even get to say fuck once!

*Ok so I've probably never said that here, or anything too close to it, but I've written about 3 posts over the years about sexist stuff so it's sorta in the what for what of a better expression I will call the "ballpark".

TSQNEA #9.2 - That ole chestnut again...

Leaves are not the only thing falling..
Originally uploaded by Ms Kat.

What is it about old chestnuts? Why do people bring them up all the time? I couldn't count the instances where I've heard* an acquaintance disdainfully refer to an "old chestnut" which had apparently been recently "brought up"!

Now, no one I ever met* had just finished a conversation with someone who'd just regurgitated a stale nut. They meant something else entirely. The "old chestnut" they were referring to meant something like "thing I think is bullshit that lots of people say and likely have been saying for quite some time now".

So my question is, put more specifically "why are those things called chestnuts?" I know there are lots of clever people on google who are happy to explain it to me at the click of a mouse, but I'm going to go ahead and guess.

Chestnuts are associated with old people. I dunno they eat them or something. There are Christmas songs about them, stuff about roaring fires and other old fashioned types of things. Old people are known to talk about old people stuff. Some of the stuff is the sort of stuff we pine for, wishing it was still like that. Some of the stuff is the sort of stuff that hasn't changed in all those years, and the other stuff is the sort of stuff we don't like, that a lot of people say and have been saying for quite some time now.

*Or read it in blog comments, and it's probably 7-10 times but I couldn't be sure because I don't pay that much attention to it.

*Or read the comments of in a blog.. if they met a chestnut regurgitator then I never heard about it.

I thought I'd update my profile pic..

I thought it was time to do it. I have so many photos of me now cos I'm doing the 365 thing there were a fair few to choose from. The one that got the nod is the "reject" if you like from day #36, where I moan on about being grown up and how it feels so unlike me etc etc etc as I've gone on so many times, hence the braids, which look silly and I'm way too old to be sporting that look yes I know, I know, I know!!!!

I updated the word bit of the profile too, mostly to shorten it and keep to the basics, which I thought was more appropriate considering the path I've been taking lately. Or ever.

Just so you know.

Something to ponder..

I've been looking through my stats recently, and it seems that people looking for Meisner Technique related content seem to find the blog regularly. Specifically people looking for difficult activities for it. If you don't know what this means, which you probably don't unless you're one of the people looking up Meisner technique activities, and actually stuck around to look at the front page (or in fact that this is the page your search leads to, which is likely seeing as I'm using those words repeatedly in it) well I'm not going to explain it here, it's just something that one uses while doing the Meisner technique.

Now.. the problem is, my posts don't have any help for people who want help with finding said difficult activities, just me going on about my classes. I thought I should get back into doing it, for the purpose of being more service to those people.. and well, getting back into the acting thing which I haven't been doing at all for like.. years.

But, of course, one of the major reasons I quit going, apart from being a lazy fat ass, is that I could never think of activities that were worth a shit, neither difficult or meaningful or any of the other criteria that you need for them.. so there'd just be more of me grumbling that I can't think of an activity. So not much help there then.

I'm afraid I'm not a lot of use to the people who come here for interesting knowledge about cats either.. although that's something I can study.. and maybe offer to readers, one day.

I'd like to be of use to someone somewhere :)

Filler post #.. oh who the fuck knows..

The word o' the day is:

aubade: a song greeting the dawn..

isn't that lovely. *gets all dewy eyed and stuff*

Quotes:

He was usually still awake when the birds began to warble their aubade.

-- Christopher Buckley, "What was Robert Benchley?", National Review, June 16, 1997

And there he lingered till the crowing cock...
Sang his aubade with lusty voice and clear.

-- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Emma and Eginhard

Gwynn was up the back, playing a soft aubade on the piano that Feni had installed years ago when business was brisker and he could afford to pay entertainers.

-- K.J. Bishop, The Etched City

That's all.

A few pointless facts about today.

Today I finally washed my hair with shampoo, after about 4 days of washing with just water, soap(not even worth it) and such a tiny bit of shampoo that I might as well have been washing with water, or soap as it happens. Consequently my hair doesn't feel like rubber anymore, and it looks alright.

It's the first of Feb, meaning that Jan is over. Nuff said.

Today's date 02.01,2010 is a palindrome. Unless you use the month/day/year format for numeric dates, in which cased it was on the 2nd of January and you missed it.

It is the 32nd day of the year. It's also the first day of year where the number day of the year it falls on, isn't also the number in the date. This is interesting to me because of my 365 days activities, where I post a self portrait of myself for every day for 365 days. I began at the beginning of this calendar year, and up to know it's been day 1, 1st Jan, day 16, 16th Jan etc. Starting from now I am going to be fully aware of which day of the year it is, where most people generally don't.. unlike in Jan for obvs reasons. It isn't such a big deal now, but come day 156 for example I'll be impressing everyone with my instant knowledge of this admittedly useless fact. That is if I keep it up for much longer. And I actually keep aware of the number I'm up to as opposed to just sticking up a photo and numbering it one before the other one.

Today is a Monday :)