Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Who Would Jesus Stiff?

I went to my usual class again last night. Well it's not all that usual, I've been missing a lot of classes lately due to a major block in creativity. I sucked. I did a door and it was bad. Everyone else in the class was brilliant so I feel extra crappy in comparison to everyone.

But it doesn't matter. What matters is the beer. After class we went to the pub. We sat around, drinking beer, talking, laughing and trying to outdo each other in wit and charm. I won of course but I don't think anyone recognized that I did.

After a bit of joking around JP, a member of our christian family started talking about Jesus to a member of the class, and from what I could understand was trying to "save" him. It didn't appear to work, though the guy was listening to him, he was obviously treating it as a joke.

But JP was not deterred. He turned to John, another class member who had become interested in the conversation. They began a debate which included a lot of stuff I'd heard before from reading about this a lot on the internet, JP was saying the prayer you need to say to let Jesus into your heart and talking about His great gift that you just have to accept, while John was asking a lot of typical questions of skeptics. I listened in to most of it as I found it interesting. Both were very committed to their views but it stayed civil, and when they finished talking they were still friends who both believed exactly what they believed before they began the conversation.

JP was obviously in the mood for some Jesus talk, he turned to me and asked if I wanted to get the gift of getting into heaven (or something like that) and I told him I don't believe there is a heaven, and he said ok and moved on to the guy next to me, who gave his own reason for not wanting to listen to it, and JP left it.

So it was ok. Nice guy if a bit young and idealistic, though that's just my opinion. Then it was time for them to go. JP and his group left. It didn't look like he'd left money so we figured he'd paid at the bar for their group. Whatever, we carried on...

but, about an hour later, when the last of us paid the bill there was a discrepancy. Everyone paid for their own, but there was some mysterious beers left over.

The Christians didn't pay!


Moral of the story is, if you're going to try to make people follow your religion by promising them a gift of love and an afterlife full of happiness and plenty, then don't leave them with your bill.

Seriously, pay for your beers Christians. You'll get more converts that way.


Barry Leiba said...

«But JP was not deterred.»

They tend not to be. Energizer-bunnies for Jesus.

«and when they finished talking they were still friends who both believed exactly what they believed before they began the conversation.»

The best result one can hope for. Cool.

Apart from that, though, well, maybe he thought God was going to pay his bar tab. I mean, hey, you have this imaginary friend, and you think he goes around helping you and all, so why not figure he'll be good for a hundred koruna or so?

Makes sense to me, in a schizophrenic sort of way.

Michelle said...

Hmmm, I wouldn't count on God to pay for anything. Jesus on the other hand is supposed to be a generous type dude and you'd expect him to pay for the beers. Hell, you'd expect him to magic up the fucking beers from water! I expect that's how he got his original converts. He should never have given up that trick, I could totaly go for that one.

Anonymous said...

«and when they finished talking they were still friends who both believed exactly what they believed before they began the conversation.»

For what it's worth, which is probably not a lot, this applies in all situations, not just when religious folk are attempting to proselytize. Let's face it, most of the "debate", all the conversation on this huge beast we call the internet amounts to, "look how smart I am - love me, admire me" or, "I'm like you, please accept me into your group". The bible bashers I believe are in a minority. Whatever, nothing changes. Who gives a fuck about "truth"?


Nicholas said...

And if they felt any guilt I expect they just prayed it away.