Almost very near a half century

It's my birthday tomorrow. I'm going to be 48. It's not a big milestone year but it's just a bit older and a bit closer to the next decade. And 50 sounds old, way too old, I mean 40 is already too old and I'm already barreling down towards the next one.. how did that happen?

There's not much to be done about it except for cry, which I just might do, but I'm going to leave my birthday wish list here:

A guitar, electric preferably.              My own room, or flat or house, any of those will do.                                      Enough money so that I don't have to work anymore.                                  To be able to go back in time to do everything differently and better and to be back in those days and be younger now.. alternatively to have been born later so I am younger now, and also that current times didn't suck and had better music.

That's about all. Though I may add some things to my wish list by Christmas.

A job, a home and...

.. that's all really. I have a job of sorts. It's something I never wanted to do, I hate it, and I don't technically get paid if I don't do it well and oh yeah, I suck at it.

Home has a roof and a bed and not much more except for the company of lovely people who don't know how to use headphones or put on pants and like to talk loudly on the phone and generally suck in numerous ways even for humans, who, in my experience are a pretty sucky species.

That's my life. I'm not saying there are not moments that aren't 100% awful but, and one doesn't want to overuse a crude monosyllabic word like "sucks" but.. it ain't great. I will be continuing the whining for months, if not years to come.