The Doom

 This fucking pandemic continues to wreak havoc on the world and as one tiny insignificant part of the world, my life.

To put it plainly, things suck. I've been stuck in a sort of miserable, stressful stasis for almost 3 months now. No job, no money, one and a half pairs of clothes, no guitar, no stuff. I mean stuff is probably overrated but it does help to have more than one set of clothes and things like makeup and toenail clippers, socks without holes, a hairbrush. Also if you have not much to do with your time apart from stress out it's good to have things like books, writing paper.. my fucking guitar!!!

I have a place to stay. It's been a while and I guess I'm lucky I am still able to stay there at this point but it also comes with the stress of not knowing how long it will last, or how much notice I'll get when the time to get cast out comes. Also, saying something is lucky when your life has turned to shit but one small thing happens to save you from a worse fate is weird. If I was lucky the world wouldn't have shut down, I wouldn't have lost my job, had no chance to get another job, run out of money, been evicted, had all my stuff stolen etc etc.

There was one bright point last week where one member of the police acknowledged that what happened to us was unambiguously wrong and gave us hope for a bit, but nothing's happened.

People have been good, they've helped a lot so I kind of hate to whine, but it just isn't enough, not from them who have mostly given us more than they could afford but just generally. It shouldn't be like this. There shouldn't be a situation where people need to rely on continuous handouts and people being stuck out of the country to just survive, and it can't last, but that is how it is.