2020, despite the elegant symmetry of the date, has not been good to me. It started poorly, went downhill from there and the rest is a strange time in history which we all, everywhere on this earth have experienced together.
The pandemic has been hard on me, as I've explained enough for to be nearing "ad nauseum" levels and it isn't getting better.
My life has been a mediocre catastrophe, that is deeply stressful, always on the edge of destitution, but in a really boring way that's not worthy of writing a novel about. And it's not getting better.
July decided to slap me in the face, with me being roped into servitude for my landlord, doing jobs that were not properly explained, that the tools were not provided for and that I didn't feel confident doing. So I did a poor job which I was reminded of repeatedly, nevertheless I was expected to be on call for this work I was not (apparently) capable of barely getting done.
I did that until the showdown. Not with me, I'm a pathetic appeaser who lets people treat me like that, but I'm not the only one who lives here. Not everyone puts up with shit like that. And that was it, we were more fucked than before.
So I spent the night talking on the phone, fielding intrusive questions (how much do you think your work is worth? Zero apparently) and how much do you think you owe (well no more than half of what you claim fuck face) and generally panicking.
Then everything got saved, some friends talked to her, helped out a bit, and danger was averted. For now.
What I really want is a miracle. Some (realistic) good fortune or help is not going to get rid of this shit now, and once and for all.. so I'm afraid only a miracle will do. How exactly do I get one of those?
2 comments:
Fuck! That sounds a bit grim. Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse, a Pandemic strikes!
I could use the usual platitudes such as, "I'm sure it will all turn out well", or, "Something will turn up", but such sentiments aren't helpful. I just feel so fucking helpless. Sorry. Keep me posted, please?
Yeah, I wasn't actually expecting that miracle, they tend to be fairly rare. So I'm still plodding along, surviving, I'll let you know how it all goes.
Post a Comment